Frequent commenter James Houran, Ph.D. points us to an article he did in Joe Tracy’s Online Dating Magazine in response to my statement about dating sites being searchable static billboards.
James says that people can have relationships online. I would argue there is not enough emotive bandwidth and functionality built into today’s online communication tools to effectively support the initial stages of relationships, online or off. Today’s online communication is the equivalent of grunting, what we need is the ability to hit the high notes and low and everything in between.
Online chat can as much a nightmare for women as being approached in a bar bar. Actually, most women would agree that online chat is worse due to the fact that men tend to overdo it when they realize there is a live woman on the other end. And if there is video involved? Cover your eyes when you first connect.
For some people, reading Happen Magazine or dating tips at Yahoo is enough. Others need the dating site itself to help shepherd them through the initial “reach out and touch someone” phase. Speaking of Yahoo, did you see that Personals Premiere is now only $20.83 a month? That doesn’t seem very premiere.
A brief survey of the introduction part of the dating process leaves all dating sites wanting. Dating sites are good at showing you all the people with blonde hair and no kids within 25 miles. Where they falter, and where the most improvement can occur, is helping daters through the introductory process. This is a clearly identified problem that nobody wants to tackle. Simply adding video and chat is not the only answer.
What I’m talking about is progressive communication where two people are put through less of a free-for-all conversation and instead guided through the introduction process by the next generation of introduction engines. These engines will feature directed engagement through a series of collaborative, participatory introductions, including group dates, games, trivia and Q&A.
I hope that by introducing the term, the dating industry will start thinking of ways to build services which work along side online daters, helping them make better choices, alerting them to potential problems and making the whole online dating experience that much more enjoyable.
Social networking sites are not off the hook. They suffer similarly when the amount of social interaction is measured. There is absolutely nothing social about Myspace if you ignore the chat feature. Social networking is basically advertising-supported voyeurism which needs to adapt to the changing needs of their communities. Friendster, anyone?
Technorati Tags: introduction engines, online dating, videoconferencing
