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Of the 97 million Americans who are 45 or older, almost 40 percent—36.2 million—are on the loose, according to the U.S. Census Bureau. “The stigma of looking for someone is vanishing,” says Susan Fox, founder of Personals Work, a Boston-based service that helps people create effective personal ads. “You get over your embarrassment when you look around and see how common it is.” AARP has more…