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Should I Pay $71 To see My OurTime Flirts?

ourtime-flirt-message[Editor note: This post is the most popular one on this blog and has been for a long time. Who knew?]

After signing up yesterday with a silly profile and ugly photo, I’ve received my first flirt from the new Match over-50 dating site, OurTime.

This is where I really feel for singles. Do I pay $20, $53 or $71 to see who flirted with me?  In any other context, paying $20 to read an email is insane. Especially when it’s only a wink. Dating sites really have no option but to work this way. Its unfortunate but how else are they going to get free members to convert to subscribers?



If I knew the flirt was from a verified member, I probably would be more likely to pay up, but the fact that they don’t show the person’s photo or username or a bit of text from/about them has me on the defensive.

I’m talking to OurTime tomorrow, should be able to report back with some clarity on where the profiles are being copied over from and other details about the launch.


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  1. buckscountygirl says:

    Thanks for the info on OurTime. I too, find it ridiculous to spend 20 bucks just to read or reply to an email. If there were a 2,3 or 5 day trial period, that would be great. But they don’t hit you with the cost until AFTER you’ve signed in, given your profile information, etc. I know these sites have to make money, but I feel a little scammed. I’d rather pay that money to a proven site, like – but would actually rather not pay at all!! I thought females were a commodity on dating sites? Go figure!!

  2. Glad for the info on dating services. Was on & Jazzed. Got no responce from ANY 1. Just recently joined OurTime & will stay for a little while. So far not doing any good. Got a lot that did view my profile, i’ve enen sent e-mails,flirts to no avail. They(men), talk about respect yet it seems that there are more that BS & don’t live up to what they write. It’s just exhausting!

    • I thought ONLINE dating websites were bad…..LANDLINE dating sites are HORRID! Men talking about THEIR maleness & what they’re doing. You can complain to the so called “MEDIATOR”, but let’s face facts…these morons that leave a message, don’t know how to talk, or they’ve got the tv,dvd,music blasting in the background that you can’t hear when you get off the phone. 99.99 1/2% of what these so call males want are 1-night stands,offers to buy sex, or tell someone that they let their fingers do their walking for them, on THEMSELVES. If you’re a Plus size,Full-figured, you can forget it. They want armcandy, not a woman of today! I’m ok with myself!

      • You go girl! They seem to be just pigs or worse POND SCUM. It really is a different world out there. RESPECT is a thing of the past and Chivalry is DEAD.
        We are all better off with a good book and a great movie.

  3. DO NOT use any of the dating sites!! they are scams. If you notice in most of the profiles they cannot spell or speak proper English in them. THEY ARE FAKE. Plus sadly if you create a profile with your photos, when you cancel your profile many of these sites use YOUR photo and create a fake profile. ITS ALL ABOUT MAKING MONEY. No different with or Eharmony either. TRIED THEM ALL. Once in awhile, esp at first, you will get mail from someone in your area, but I promise it wont happen again. ONLY “Free” site is DONT KNOW WHERE YOU ARE SUPPOSE TO MEET SOMEONE NICE ESP IN YOUR 50’s. SAD.

  4. Agree with all of the above. Do not waste your money. Some people make a career out of the dating websites. Some of these websites are representing the bottom of the barrel. Have meet some of these men and yes they are the worse of the worse. And right some of them cannot even spell and have no conversational skills. It’s a making money deal for the websites. Face to face is still better.

  5. Thanks for the information.
    I was about to pay for becoming a member in ourtime. I’m glad I did’nt.

  6. I heartily agree with all the above comments. To get your subscription, they ‘salt the mine’ with phoney flirts, then after you pay, the men-all think they deserve the cheerleader they couldn’t get in high school-ignore any flirts or emails. I so much prefer the women of my generation for company and friendship, so what is an old, bald, overweight retired guy going to offer me? Ugh. Face to face is better, I agree. I just gave my cancellation.

    • I have also tried all kind of sites…FORGET about match and ourtime. They are full with fake profiles and you have to buy a subscription in order to see which spammer contacted you. There is one great site which caters to the 50+ 50plus-club. They have a free (basic) membership and a premium (paid). As a basic member member you can answer ALL emails and contact all premiums!! They also do a great spammer management. If a fake contacts you, then you will get a notice from admin that the message came from a spammer and the spammer gets deleted.
      I can heartily recommend this site.

  7. So where do you find the nice people over 50?

  8. I have to agree with Jade. If you are over 50 its almost a hopeless scenario. Guys are not the way they make themselves out to be. They might say they are looking to spend the rest of their lives with us, but if you ask me its all just a reason to get you to the bedroom. Then after that its SEE YA. I have not complied with any of the bs nor will I, On Match I have gotten many emails from scammers. Maybe its because I am a widow I don’t know. The men are always widowers and lost their mate in an auto accident or cancer and its always 5-8 years ago. They always start their emails with HELLO PRETTY. Then they reveal themselves even further with badly written emails eventhough their profiles are beautifully laid out. Ladies be careful its a jungle out there.

    • Hello Pretty…..OMG, I wish I had seen this post earlier. I received 3 e-mails from “guys” that started out exactly like that. Upon a second e-mail the “guy” would ask tons of questions and declare his undying love (as if we had known each other for months). By the third e-mail what few tidbits he shared did not match the profile posted on the site. Once I figured out the issues I had fun just baiting them to see what other BS they would post. All of them finally quit writing because I just didn’t love them enough and I wouldn’t share my phone number or even full name, much less first name. – terrible site for this as well.

  9. There is a site called that is free. It’s not a dating site perse’ but tons of groups with varied interests that have lots of fun activities in your area. Check it out…you won’t be disappointed ! Good luck…

  10. I tried out the site Mostly it seems to be a site for men to view your photos and whistle at you via flirts. I don’t think it was all bad, but it certainly was not a “dating” site. Overall I was uncomfortable and often skeptical about whether the profiles and their senders were genuine. There does not seem to be any reason to pay for this sort of thing. If anything it should be free for women as we are outnumbered on that site aobut 10 to 1. I was disappointed that among an older crowd the behavior was still juvenile.

    • Allison, I know it’s difficult trying to meet someone at our advanced age and that’s true for guys; at least guys that aren’t full of it and trying to just get arm candy as indicated by another poster. I don’t blame you and the others for your feelings. But from my perspective, the women that have taken care of themselves and I don’t mean the cheerleaders, etc. but staying active and caring about their appearance, are too often thinking they deserve to be “special” and courted and wine and dined. You, in my opinion, only fed into and supported my opinion with your “If anything it should be free for women as we are outnumbered 10 to 1″ I consider this to be “still juvenile”. I’ve never felt that women should get free admission or drinks because they pull in the men who will spend the money. We both work or worked and we both probably want to meet someone that is genuine. A world where one gender has to try to impress the other and win them over with their charms (too often meaning what they can do for the other financially) creates an environment and culture that does not lend itself to genuine. I find myself “competing” with those that are full of it and unfortunately and in my opinion again, most women perpetuate and reenforce this behavior; it seems to be the norm.

  11. Well, I guess I will be the one who disagrees…
    I just turned 65 and have not had any problems finding women who meet my criteria. Divorced more than a year, I’m looking for a life-mate, creative, attractive, feminine, warm. I have been overwhelmed by the positive response and regular emails. My biggest problem is that I’ve also been getting notes from women who live out of my area, and that’s not at all what I’m looking for.

    I think one key is that you MUST be able to put some words together in a cogent manner, and I believe many folks have difficulty with that. That’s not a reflection of anyone in particular, just my observation, and the result of dinner discussions with others. So, there really is hope for those over fifty. Actually, I think we’re MUCH more attractive to the opposite sex! Good luck to all…

    • Very Interesting. I agree finding some local is an issue but maybe not impossible. Just found this sight and thought Id respond. I did try another site had some good conversations but that was it. Haven’t tried any on line sight in a long time. Let’s see what happens……This should be interesting….

  12. I found that at our age most people are settled. I have built my dream retirement home and would never move.. Men who have planned on retirement usually feel the same way. I DO NOT want a forever husband….just a companion to dance with sometimes, go for a fish fry, or go fishing, hiking.. Unless you are the ultimate “arm candy” the kind of response you get from online dating sites are those who want to know what kind of sex you like…or Mr.”Havent had a job for awhile and living with mother, willing to relocate..!!” or “Still married but sex life is terrible”.. Too many are insenstive boobs with their brains caught in their zippers!!!
    Are there atually women out there that desperate???
    I can pour my own glass of good wine, waltz around in front of the fireplace, make my own fish fry, and take my dobermans with fishing or hiking.
    I will only miss good conversation.
    I will not pay for another dating service….
    Perhaps I should not put all in same catagory, but I have tried two. Reviews not good, so far, on this one.
    I was hoping…………

  13. I think we are supposed to meet a nice Gent the way it was back in the day when there were gents. My late hubby was a dear from start to finish. He was 64 when he passed 5 years ago. I am not looking to replace him. Just want a sweet guy to spend time with. Love good conversation and flirting, hand holding and just being in the moment.. Why is it so hard to come by?

  14. meaculpa ariaza says:

    I am a 62 yr old woman. I join tbese sights because i’m on an ego trip. I love to see what is out there and be told i’m fabulous and hot. I know I am and I feel good about myself. I love to play internet games. Its fun. Whoever takes this online crap seriously needs a reality check!! LADIES, this is entertainment! Lighten up!

  15. meaculpa ariaza says:

    And one more thing ladies per my experience ALL men in these sites are so ugleeee. They can’t find anyone in the real!!! lol lol

    • Meaculpa, I don’t get to see the pictures of men on the site that I visit but I don’t think I’m ugly at all. I’m not perfect and I’m not Paul Newman; although I am about the same size he was. I’m just not as talented or as wealthy. I don’t see a problem with your advice, to lighten up ladies and see this as entertainment………but I think it is very possible you could be an example of a woman being like the guys these other “ladies” are complaining about in that you aren’t being genuine. At least I think it would be more acceptable if you were at least were up front with this attitude with all of us ugly men out here.

  16. Lost Cause says:

    I am 62 and have been back on the dating scene for the last 2 plus years. I thought it would be easy to find a “soul mate”. However my first meetings have been more like “dates of elimination” than precusors to a real date. Most of the problems have been with men who do not know how to properly interact with another human being..they talk incessantly about themselves, their stuff, ex’s, past boring events of their lives..without taking a breath. I might as well put a mirror in front of them and walk away..they would not notice the difference. I have sat through these soliloques and was not even asked what kind of work I do. Also since I have a softer voice, I get interrupted and talked over, fairly regularly. Any kind of this bad behavior and I call it a date killer and vow never to bother with them again.
    As far as the men, most of their photos do not show them accurately nor are some honest about their current state of their health. One guy had a half deformed head, hidden in this profile photos, which he failed to mention before meeting. Most are whining about their finances and those who aren’t are probably looking for arm candy half their age. I just hope these get saddled with a new baby at age 65– this would serve them right. Lastly, its weird how many pass the phone conversation part to make it to the “date of elimination” only to inform me shortly after that they will be gone to their childrens, mothers, job for the next couple weeks and will call when they return. Really? Am I to hold my breath until they decide to call? Some even set up a tentative date for the next day or so and then never bother to call to cancel. If I am planning my precious time to make myself available for a real date, I am certainly not going to plan anything else. This happened to me on New Year Eve this year. No call or even a text. Its rude, inconsiderate and just plain socially defective.
    I am drug and alcohol free, own my own business, make good money, have traveled and can interact with people of all levels and background. While I am not a 10, I am very acceptable. I am in good health, not overweight and intelligent. I have no baggage or problems with children, finances or family. You’d think it would not be impossible to find my mate..but I have come to believe that it would be easier to put together an rubrics cube, blindfolded, than it would be to find that one person to share the rest of my life with…at least online. The truth is, at my age, I am beginning to believe I may spend my twilight years alone.

    • Lost Cause, I have been single now for about 9 years and have only met one person and she was very nice but we never really had a “date”. It wasn’t a really bad experience but it didn’t work out. But other than that, I’m finding meeting someone to be very difficult and have pretty much accepted that I’m not going to. I still get on OKcupid and check it out but most matches that look somewhat promising are at least a 100 miles away which is not optimal to casually get to know one another. I’m not wealthy and not poor. But I’m suspicious that most women that have taken care of themselves are looking, whether they believe this or not, for someone that is well off financially. Anyway, you seem to be a bit bitter and maybe with good reason. Take care and good luck.

  17. I got on MEGAMATES, where you have to buy a subscription to get your messages. All i can say is that i’ve gotten messages from guys that I knew from years ago! Then had 1 foulmouthed critter i talked to…so glad he never called me back! I got alot of messages form the 20s,30s & 40s crowd. My age(59), is posted in my greeting,etc. Still, i get messages from the under 50 crowd! I can say this a vulgar message left for me that made me want to put a “cap” in the senders ass. Instead, i reported him, megamates went into their system(after i gave them my passcode),listened & said that i was right to report him. They(megamates), donot put up with messages like that being sent! So, i feel that since i got on this site, & see that alot of women share the similar things that i’ve experience, i’m ok with being an unattractive,full-figured woman! Alot of the OLDER men try that BS also & then i ask them(older men), “r u going thru yo MANOPAUSE”? I get the Menopause,sexual peak crap asked sometimes. Oh, also, if i’ve got BIG breast! That’s where i hang up! Me, is A-OK with ME….SOLO!

  18. I totally agree with dating sites. They suck. Men on there are not who they say they are and then I hear them complain that women on the sites are way too harsh.
    If you look at one site, like POF, then look at Match, E-harmony all the same men are on those sites. It’s like a game of competition for them, men who do not want to committ, men who are full of baggage with women who cheated on them and do not trust anyone else, and never went to therapy to deal with it, men who ask you on the first email what’s your idea of sexual fun?? I tried POF, that was a disaster, Match for one day and that too, simply a disaster, way to overwhelming to sit at a pc all day and try to wean out one or two people to meet only to find out they are meeting people all the time. At our age is is just HARD TO meet someone good, and single. Married men and women about who are looking for affairs. NOT For me, E-Harmony is in it for the money, I have met the owner and have his books as for being Christian , it is no different than any other site. There are just as many dysfunctional Christians as there are on any other site. I would just like to meet a really good man, kind, caring, loving, funny who is around my age or a bit younger or one who does not act like 58 going on 80.
    Put the request out to your friends and family that you are interested in meeting someone to date, blind dates when someone knows you and the other are usually dates that work !! Any other ideas pls let me know.
    WI Sparkie

  19. My goodness, but there are somebotter ladies here! I am truly sorry so many of you have had bad experiences on I joined the site recently, hoping to perhaps find a companion, but have found much of what you say true. My first “hit” was by a scammer and while I have received a few genuine responses, nothing has been particularly encouraging. Granted, I’m not the Brad Pitt you ladies seem to want, but I am genuine, literate and real. Just so you know, I actually did lose my wife of 24 years to cancer. Obviously, dating sites like these don’t work unless you are a ripped 24 year old or a supermodel. Just remember- people do read these posts,so try not to represent yourself as the thing you seem to despise.

  20. Hey Microdoc,

    There are great men and women out here. I am alot like the lady who said she can make her own fish fry’s, dance around the fireplace, but at our age, who and we know we can be independant, who wants to do alone any longer. So she has a house and maybe HE does too, well guess what you can always sell both, and buy one together or rent them both out…I guess at my age I am looking for ” interdependance ” unlike the lady who can do her own thing, she sounds angry.
    Alot of women on her sound angry at men, and few men at women although on any dating site I’d say it’s half and half….there are jerks of all kinds.

    I just want someone who is king, caring, good, gentle, honest, and loving. He does not have to be MR. Bachelor…..while I look really good for my age, like I am in my 40’s, and am 58, I realize it is who you are inside that counts not what you look like. Looks fade, or people get ill…then what? If you don’t love that person the way their heart and soul is inside, and their spirit, you have nothing but a physical body that will fade in time. Both sexes need to realize that, cougars too…and men alike.


    • Thank you for the reply. I am cancelling my subscription to the site, since it really does seem worthless. I am old school anyway and prefer to meet someone real, rather than a photograph that may have been taken 20 years ago or no picture and a fake e-mail address. My profile on the site is real, as are the photos. I purposely used a different address and username here, but I’m easy enough to find on the OurTime site- for now. Good luck ladies and remember to be safe.

      • Microdoc,

        Thanks for your questions, observations, and balance. I don’t want to surf around on the e-dating sites again. I just left a 3+ year relationship that started on eharmony but we both fell for that old cliche: “Women commit to men thinking that they will change; men commit to women thinking that they won’t change.” But, we had fun for a while and it was a nice transition. I wished him well, and did the same for me. I, too, posted real-time photos and information on-line, and assumed others did the same. I’m now more realistic about the “dressing up” that most folks do on-line. I’m going to keep my life rich with interactive situations like volunteer work, book clubs, and outings, and expect to meet new friends and good people that way. If I am supposed to find a “special someone” I’m sure that they’ll show up, and if not life is interesting anyway! Good luck to you, and thanks again for the perspective!

  21. Well ladies I feel stupid I got taken on by a guy that stole a guys identity and all and he ended up being an African scammer and took me for $1200!! I have to be thankful it was only that before I caught on! I felt so stupid!!b
    But he had an answer for everything and even charmed with a dozen roses!! He was “good” Anyway ladies I don’t know if he’ll continue to use his stolen identity or not but his name was “ambrosini woods” I appreciate all the warnings about these sites cause they don’t check out anybody! That’s for sure !

  22. About the gal that got taken for $12oo bucks, I feel so sorry for her. When it comes to my money I do not share, As far as Match there are far to many scammers on that site. Don’t know about the other paid sites but this one is a dusy, Note: If they say widower, woman 40-70, have two pics, they are all full of bs. Have been tracking them for years. Same schemes over and over. Most of them say they have 1 child and lost their wives to car acccidents or cancer. Ususally their english is quite poor, Be careful People they are out there in droves, Pig is a great site. Check it out.

  23. Hi everyone and thanks for the heads up regarding Since I have tried a few other sites with limited success, I decided to read the reviews before joining Ourtime. Sadly, I don’t see enough positive reviews to move forward with a membership. On a brighter note I do have a friend in her 70’s who with the encouragement of her children joined and met a very nice gentleman last year. They have since become a couple, moved together and at the very least give me reason to hope. So I guess I’ll keep looking, thanks again.

  24. Thanks to all the reviewers out there. To the rants, all I can say is us guys see the same things that you ladies are bothered by, with the exception of the sexual advances. Pretenders, outright fakes, 20 years old pictures. The only site that I have had success was EHarmony. I found love there twice and both times very nice ladies. At first reading these comments it seemed slightly offensive but then I realized that we ALL are having the same bad dream, fakes, goofs, idiots, and scammers (MEN and WOMEN). It has been tiresome but the last lady from EHarmony was just wonderful. We are still friends, just can’t be together. Good luck, all.

    • Michael, I agree that we see the same things as the ladies; and with the exception of the sexual advances. Take care and glad you have had some success.

  25. WhatAWaste says: is a waste! Signed up for 6 months (how stupid was that??) and after two days realized I’d made a mistake and wasted my money! Compared to another site I used a few years ago it is lacking in search, info, message and sorting through the muck! Very disappointed!!!

  26. So far I have found dating websites to be nothing but a joke. I have tried Ourtime, eHarmony and Match all with the same type of results. When I have been approached by men it has been for sex solicitations. My profile has nothing in it that would lead someone to believe I am only out there for that kind of contact. My girlfriend gets approached by people asking her for money. In my opinion these sites prey on people who are lonely and looking for love and just take your money…no better than the thieves and liars who have contacted me. I am going back to chance meetings or setups through friends.

  27. I am having mixed experiences. I am very surprised at the amount of Christians on this site. I was not expecting that one.
    I am clueless how to meet men who are decent, happy, financially settled and not into this with the wrong head. I have been on okcupid, our time and
    I have not been scammed, seems that is left to men to complain about…just wish there were normal people somewhere.

  28. I totally agree with what everyone has said about the on line dating scenario. I refuse to pay after trying out a free site and then just the other night there was a segment on CNN where a woman who had met someone on (which they paid for) only to find she didn’t want to continue the relationship, broke it off in October only to come home one night in January and this man proceeded to stab her…luckily she lived thank God. After that segment all my questions were answered, so no I wouldn’t pay a cent to have a conversation for a person we really don’t know. Going back to the old seeing someone and being attracted to them is the true way to go. I’m happy and comfortable with myself and if I’m meant to be alone, so be it.

  29. Ok Ladies,

    Yes there may be many men on these websites that are scumbags and only want one thing out of you. Well let me tell you, I am not one of those men. I met my last girlfriend on 6 years ago and we had some great times. I treated here like gold and did anything for her. While she took advantage of me for the last three years and treated her cats better than me. I am a good guy and am now very leery about what all women want from a man. It is hard to give all of yourself and get nothing in return. I do believe that there is a wonderful woman that will treat me they way I should be treated. The problem is I have not found a place to meet them. I have not pulled the trigger on signing up for because I don’t believe the winks and crap are real. I wish I could find a site that is real and could find someone and start out as friends and see where it goes. So stop the bitching on the guys, we are not all pond scum. There are a lot of women out there that just want one thing as well.

    Greg 49

    • Greg, I could not agree with you more…The winks and flirts are cumbersome and time wasters. Where does one go to find a man who is quality? For you, a woman? I too, met someone on…problem was he was a commitment phobe and I am finding those men to whom I respond are fishing and nothing more.

      Let me know if you start a site for quality humans. I will join!

      • Well Shelley,

        We could always setup a group on facebook for singles and people can join through facebook. Just a thought. All of the women her seen like they have had a bad luck.

    • Well said Greg 49.

      I don’t judge all women by the types I have met in the past, especially on these websites. I’m talking about women who are testing the waters before they file for a separation. The ones who use a picture out of a fashion magazine (like I can’t tell the difference), or the ones who are looking a ‘perfect’ man to be on call. Then there are the women who ‘like’ cottage life, boating, travel or fast cars – which means, if you don’t have a cottage, boat, willing to take them travelling, or have a fast car, don’t bother calling.

      I am what I am – well educated, compassionate, romantic, clean, self sufficient, honest, caring, reliable and loyal – which obviously that doesn’t seem to be enough these days. I’m not looking for arm candy, a super model or a play toy, just someone I can be proud to have as a partner.


      • Michael, I hope you don’t mind if I just ditto what you have indicated here. I don’t know if I would use the “proud to have as a partner” for me but I do want someone that I am comfortable with and I guess “proud of” is not inaccurate. And I think that Greg might be on to something with the Facebook thing.

  30. Greg,

    I am not sure it is just women. I have spoken to a lot of men who complain bitterly about women. Many have been scammed, others feel as though they are a meal ticket…it is truly a challenge to find an attractive, energetic, willing to commit man who doesn’t look at dating websites as a fishing expedition.

    Our time is decent, but as I said, very skewed with Christians. Since I am not, most will not date me. And the flirts are so annoying! I even start and finish my profile with a request to refrain, but that rarely occurs. You should give it a try for a month and see how you do!

    • Well,

      If I try it for a month, then you will need to send me a flirt or a text. You seem like a nice person and I would like to talk more.

      No other way to get in touch with you.


  31. I will happily send you a flirt…ok, I will go big and send you two…just let me know your user name!

    • Shelly,

      Are you a member now? my name is FUNQAMAN Age 49

    • Hey Shelley and Greg,

      I agree with Shelley about the amount of Christian men. But a lot of men do say, nO pREFERENCE. I have been seeing a lot more of late on Match.
      Sorry Greg about your last lady friend. Sounds like she was taking advantage of you. She saw a sweetie and jumped. Then there are the good ones who no one every emails because we are over 50. Shame.

      So far I have lost track of the scammers on Match. Want to point out one more time to all you ladies. The men are almost always widowers, seeking age
      40-70, post only one pic, they are usually drop dead handsome, the profile is beautifully written and they prey on the innocent suckers like me. BE CAREFUL. tHEY ALWAYS GIVE THEMESELVES AWAY BECAUSE THEY CANNOT SPELL AND THEIR SYNTAX STINKS.

      • Pennie,

        I was thinking of creating a Group on facebook something like
        Meet New Friends 2-14-12. Make it private, but I have to add at least one friend to create it. Did not want to send it to any of my other facebook friends kind of private.



  32. Hey Microdoc,

    Not looking for Brad Pitt will almost settle for Hugh Heffner at this point. Just want a sincere, sweet, loving guy. Like a jerk I still have HOPE.

  33. Hi Pennie,

    I am over 50…and still have hope, but will admit it’s fading…thanks for the tip on the widowers…will be mindful!

  34. Just registered yesterday, 2/14/12 . At this writing 2/15 68 new mssgs, 31 new flirts:) Really??? Looking at “who viewed me, ewwww :( No thanks. I’m also on POF, and ok cupid, but they’re free, I like that:). Will someone think of something PUHLEEZ….. Uggghhhh so tired of this;/

  35. Hi I would like to tell all of you I was taken for$3,800. and all I hear is all of this well how do you think I feel? Will set up a meeting singles at buffalo wild wings in mt. prospect, illinois every friday at 5:50p.m. and it will not cost anything to meet people there and it’s in person can’t beat that! how does that sound? please let me know thank you, gary.

    • Gary, thanks for setting up the meet and greet at buffalo wild wings but I’m in central Texas so I don’t think I’ll be able to make very often. Good luck to all that do though.


  37. I agree with Phyllis about site. A few years ago I met some interesting men BUT not 1 of them was very truthful in what they wrote in their profile… Single were Married, 20 yo pics, Not the age they stated, or really were just Serial Daters. I was thinking about trying Ourtime since I was hoping that older, mature men would be different…Now I am not sure.

    • Linda,

      Not all men are like this. I am not a serial dater. You have to find the right person. I singed up for the one month trial, I have had some nice conversations with some people that seen very nice. Just look out for the men that say they are widowed.


      • I got found by one of those “widowers” yesterday….let him know I ‘got it’ and I sure hope he’s gone…scumbags!

        Where are all the nice, honest, ambitious, chivalrous men?


  38. Ouch wish I had read these yesterday prior to joining OurTime …I like the idea of the facebook group…I am wondering how exactly are you being taken for these large amounts of money?

    • I also like the facebook group idea.

      • The facebook idea is sounding better and better. I’ve about had it with the “dating” sites, free or otherwise. The biggest problem for me (single, 62) is location – why can’t I meet a guy who, in the beginning, just wants to have a cup of coffee in San Francisco so we can get to know each other a bit? Maybe people could put their general location on the facebook page (if it gets started) :)

  39. Wow! There sure are a lot of disappointed and disillusioned (with online dating) women on this comments page, which I just stumbled across after seeing a pop-up advert for OurTime and wanted to see what it was all about.

    Ladies, we men aren’t all scamming, sex-craved “widowers” looking to game these dating sites, and I’m sorry to read about the experiences you’ve had with those types. (Those blokes you encountered have given a bad name to the gents among us.) I’d been on Match — with an HONEST, thoughtful and (hopefully) grammatically correct profile — and have had the good fortune of experiencing some good, lasting relationships (one that lasted for years).

    Mind you, I’m not writing the above to exonerate men — certainly not the losers you may have encountered — but to encourage you to know there are, in fact, some good, sincere men out there, just as there are equally good and sincere women such as yourselves.

    Ted A

  40. hEY gREG AND mIKE,


  41. Hi all!! Yes, have noticed the same men are on ALL the dating sites. BUT NOONE ACTUALLY DATES!!!!! LOL I feel I could meet a better lot of men at walmart. UGLY FAT men wont date a heavy woman, they THINK they can get a blonde YOUNG petite babymaker ( hello……….ONLY if you got TRUMPS bank account honey!! ). I get sooooooo tired of reading 60 yr old men who WONT date over 40 yr old women, and want PETITE ATHLETIC BUILD……yea, Ok. Plentyof fish is a “hooking up:” dating site and all of these sites ARE FAKE. Dont waste your money, most are owned by the same people/company!! Yes, if you are a widow,as I am, you will get LOTS of “mail” from widowers!! fake again. We need to get our married friends to introduce us to their neighbor, cousin, coworker, SOMEONE!! there HAVE TO BE SINGLE MEN OVER 55??? I live in Arkansas and starting to doubt this, ha. Best of luck to all of you.

  42. Susan Feb 16…failed to mention that the site you are recommending is for Canadians. Does anybody know of a similar site for USA?
    Jade, I agree with most of ur comments since I, too, ran into same types on Match-loSERS. I am a conscientous, trustworthy, clean Attractive Lady whose profile did NOT state that she wanted Liars, or was into Serial Dating or Casual SeXX & in my pics I,m fully clothed & some had family in them! Must have been “Trustworthy” that made me a target!
    Greg,Ted, Microdoc and Others – Thanks for sticking up for REAL Men/ WOmen and for staying positive. I have renewed hope. Linda aka Dulcerosie aka LindaSeeks

  43. Apple Valley Don
    Thanks to everyone for the comments, as I was about ready to join.
    The problem is that I work 12 hr. Night shifts, 2 to 3 days per week and have nowhere to go except Applebees. I havet seen some seemingly nice ladys on christian mingle, but hesitant to join. Some 20 year old pics. You would think peoplewould be more honest on that site! I want to fall in love and get married to a christian woman. Its hard to believe that there are so many user-guys out there at this age! They have really ruined my life! Controlling and aggressive jerks!

  44. Lost Cause says:

    I have been following this thread after posing once here. I can only speak from a womans perspective, but there seems to be a constant I perceive in that many of the same men are on multiple sites looking for a LTR yet never seem to follow through on actually meeting for a date. Most seem to have no problem setting up a date and then standing their “date” up..with vague excuses for forgetting about the date. I’m beginning to believe that they are getting enough out of initial contac t (ego boosting) without having to develop a relationship or spending any money doing so..more like a virtual onlife computer game where one party may be seriously looking for a LTR while the other may or may not be seriously seeking a relationship. I might add here, being a licensed PI, if you do find some one of interest, please do a simple background free check with the local courts for civil and criminal records, as well as facebook and places like spokeo, classmates and mylife websites. You’ll find easy to access information.

    • Well lost cause,

      I am not one of those guys. I am looking for along term relationship, not a one night stand. I have been messaging and receiving messages. I follow though and have been trying to meet the wonderful women that are interested in me. Matter of fact, I have my first date on Saturday with a lovely woman.


    • Dear Lost Cause – everything you mention, I have experience from various women on these sites. Sadly, women are all too eager to state, “all men are the same” an assumption based upon a few bad experiences. I’m not saying such men don’t exist, but I certainly don’t know of any, nor would I even contemplate associating with such individuals even if I did know them, but regardless, here I stand, painted with the same brush. On the other hand, I have never uttered the words, “all women are the same” – for two very good reasons. 1) I do not judge a person based upon some distorted profile conjoured up to give me a reason to whine and complain. And, 2) as any sane man knows, I would never compare one women to another in fear of the fury so accurately described by William Congreve. Personnaly I’m tired of all this nonsence. I just experience 9 years of hell in a relationship and am now back on my own – lonely but at least I’m happy.

    • Lost Cause, It is my belief and I think I am in a very small minority, that men shouldn’t have to “spend money to develop a relationship”. I would like to take the money out of the equation. I was very active in the women’s lib movement and still believe that way which included women taking responsibility for developing relationships and not men courting and trying to impress the female of the species for “mating” purposes or relationship building. I just wish I could meet more people that shared this ideology.

      • Well, Ron, you just met one! Of course, you probably aren’t anywhere near San Francisco, but good luck to you!

      • Eve, I don’t know if you will see this reply. I may be mistaken but it looks like I’m replying to myself. But I could be wrong and even if I’m wrong, you might still check back and see it.

        It’s nice to meet you…..sort of….meet you, that is. I’m not surprised that you live in SF. I don’t. I live in central Texas in about as conservative of an area that there is in Texas; which is saying quite a lot. I’m from the NE part of Texas which is very similar to where I’m at, which is College Station, TX. I saw an earlier post of yours and I would love to have a cup of coffee, at that’s all, for a first meeting or even there after. If we liked each other we would probably know it pretty quickly. I wish you the best also. Ron

      • and that’s all

  45. Thank you all for taking the time to write. I wanted to read the reviews before going any further with OurTime. You have been quite helpful. I will not pursue it.

    Perhaps I have been luckier than most, or am naive. I have never been scammed on a dating website (knock on wood).

    I know there are nice men on dating sites because I am a nice women who is on a dating site. But I have definitely come across my share of skunks. I try to keep it all in perspective.

    I figure I can only control my thoughts and actions, whether in real life or on a dating site. None of the men I have met were purposely unkind…. but then again I choose not to assume I know the reason a man does something (call/not call)…. it saves me from worrying. I also choose not to assume I will see a man again.

    As to the skunks: after that initial ‘yuck’ feeling. I find POF’s ‘block’ button comes in quite handy. No need to be concerned with them again.

    Try not to paint all men with the same brush. They are as varied a species as we are. lol

    Take care

    • Thanks dd54. I’m afraid there are skunks out there; both male and female, and both online and in person; and not just for the purpose of dating but in all areas of life ; for example, when you buy a car or need one repaired, etc. BTW, don’t judge me too harshly for the structure of that last sentence.

  46. Unreal. Exactly same men as on…and it’s exactly the same website format and contents. Identical. Forget it.

  47. I have been on various dating sites and I can honestly say that they are all the same. I was on okcupid and e harmony. Some of the guys that are on okcupid are on e harmony. sad to say, but the guys that I have met on e harmony and on okcupid need to see a mental health counselor. The ones that claim to be over a previous relationship aren’t, then you have the ones that are on the rebound, brag about themselves or just down right rude or mean. I am by no means perfect but I would like to meet a man that isn’t from the bottom of the barrel. I’m sure there are plenty of women who are the same.

    • Diann, Why wouldn’t the same guys that are on e harmony be on OKcupid? What is the matter with that? You must have been on both to have seen this. I’m sure there are plenty of problems with men on dating sites and with men not on dating sites. The same can surely be said of women. And I would love to meet a women that is not from the bottom of the barrel………..but mainly I would like to meet a woman I like. And I’m not looking for a woman that judges all men by the poor choices she has made. I’ve made bad choices and I hope I’ve learned something from that and hopefully will make a better choice in the future. I know I’m being more careful.

  48. buckscountygirl says:

    Wow, I can’t believe this thread is still going! That’s a good thing, I guess; there’s so many of us ‘out there’ over 45 yrs. old ISO a good relationship. The internet has become a tool to help in that search, but unfortunately, it’s also filled with quite a few losers, for lack of a better term. IT’S THE SAME WAY IN REAL LIFE! The internet just makes it easier for the same people that don’t want to go out and socialize to cruise the net for someone to talk to, harass, stalk, you get the picture. I dated on the internet in the mid 90s, when I was in my 30’s, and even though the selection was a bit better since everyone didn’t have internet access, it was still a game to an extent. It’s just gotten worse because anyone and everyone with a pc, laptop or smartphone can create profiles and basically lie and waste other peoples’ time. I’ve seen married women do this, I’ve seen men who live in their moms’ basements (in their 50’s!!) do this, there is no exclusivity to genders. – What has to be understood (and yes, it takes a bit of an investment of time), is that at any age, you will have to go through sometimes a TON of crappy dates to get to that one special person. Believe me, I’ve done it, given up, become cynical, go back to dating again, give up, again, on and on. I’ve had a great relationship with the man of my life who I unfortunately lost to heart disease in 2007, so I know good relationships exist. Since then, my dating experiences have been interesting, and everyone hasn’t been a loser. It’s been fodder for stories with my friends and family (I can’t tell you how many times I’ve said ‘I shaved my legs for this?’ – how can a date not even take the time to tuck in their shirt and run a comb through their hair? Pathetic), and it’s allowed me to meet an interesting group of men (‘interesting’… hmmm…. I’ll stay with that word!). I’ve met men online through dating sites, sex sites, (that’s really a good one if you’re interested in particular hobbies & the like), yahoo groups, and even facebook. I’ve also met men at the local VFW, the grocery store (yep, they’re there!), Home Depot (there too!), the fitness center, the dog park and one in a parking lot because he liked my car! I’m not ugly but not drop dead gorgeous either ( just adorable, according to some!), I’m very tall and a bit overweight, I have a deep voice, and I’m fiercely independent. Not a barbie doll by any means! Nope, still haven’t met the man that I want to be best friends with yet, but I guess what I’m trying to say is, don’t give up out here – ENJOY THE RIDE!! If you look at dating as a challenge and only have a mission to meet the man/woman of your dreams, it’s not going to be very fun. Yes, it’s supposed to be fun! And if you do things that are fun while still looking for a mate, you’d be surprised at what might happen!! Stay safe everyone; if any of you are in the central NJ/NE PA area, drop me a line :-)

  49. buckscountygirl says:

    OH, and by the way, this whole thing/thread started because of ourtime/ – that website to me, is almost as bad as – not because of the potential for married men there, but because they are preying on those over 45 yrs. old with the promise of meeting the love of your life – I’m not saying it won’t happen there, but that was the only website I belonged to that had 3 total scammers (‘I love God, I love you, I’m an American but away in another country, blah blah…’) & a few men that really enjoyed telling me about their medical conditions…. is it my age (53)? Telling me what medications you’re on is not a good conversation starter! Good luck everyone!~

    • I have approached by multiple scammers on this site–OURTIME. It is scary as hell! I had never experienced anything like this. I received two “flirts” from two separate men who had THE IDENTICAL PROFILES..their spelling was awful , syntax worse and were widowers.

      I am very close to abandoning this site as it makes me very uncomfortable. I do not meet men easily and was hoping for something great. This is not the place–others BEWARE!!!!!!!!!

    • Beware! This website is a ripoff! Your free profile will show you received emails, to entice you to sign up. When you pay the membership fee and go to check your emails, you will discover there are dummy emails with the explanation “the person no longer has an active email on this website”!!!

      Beware! If you make the mistake and sign up for a limited number of months, the website will automatically continue to charge your credit card after that, wheter you know that or not!!! To stop the automatic renewal you need to make sure you go on line and cancell it yourself.

      There is no customer service number that I could find to void a transaction, but you receive a note that there are no refunds. When I called my credit card to contest the charge, I was given a vendor phone number for

      888-892-2065. Calling this number, you might get a PARTIAL refund.

      However, I am contesting the entire charge with my credit card, and I will contact Better Business Bureau as well as provide feed back on review websites for any other potential customers.

  50. I learned the hard way with these sites. I too spent the money to see emails from others but it’s not necessarry to do that. I’ve been on OK Cupid for FREE, and it’s like any other just don’t have to pay. I’m 56, female and to be honest what’s out there isn’t that great to begin with. I consider myself to be half way good looking, take care of myself & feel if I have to be on one of these sites there must be something wrong with me. To have to pay for it makes me feel somehow dirty.

    • Love is expensive spiritually and monetarily when it goes wrong Nobody that ever got married thought it would end up that way. Plenty of reasons marriage/ love ends. It’s easy to blame the other person but most often it’s both parties fault. The longer it lasted the more it hurts. It’s both the most wonderful thing and on the other side of the coin one of the most painful things a person can endure when it ends. There is nothing dirty about trying to better yourself and move on. Never think that about yourself. It gets way harder as you get older. Rock on girl. God help’s those that help themselves. You are out there. I bet for everyone of us there are 10 sitting in a closet somewhere. I was like that. Don’t give up.

      • I have not been on any site for weeks and I still get winks and emails. Half of the people you post to left a long time ago. It’s a fraud. If I’m not paying I’m not on the site so they use you to suck in other people when half of them already left! Try to post to some one who has given up. Wink Wink! It’s so fraudulent it’s sicking. They only want your money as fast as they can get it. People will post to you that don’t exist just to keep you paying. Yeah it’s a dirty business.

    • DO NOT waste your money on this site , when you sign up for free they make you think you have tons of messages which you cannot read unless you have a membership. Lo and Behold when you pay for a membership you discover that these messages are firts ect and you cannot respond to the people because maybe 10% have memberships, Im not attracted to a single one and I dont consider my self that fussy : 0.. RIP OFF SO GLAD I ONLY PAID FOR A MONTH 19.99 POORER BUT LESSON LEARNED……………oh and if you dont turn off automatic billing they will bill your credit card and they basically harrass you when you turn off the automatic billing.

      • Trish is so right , I did the some thing. They won’t get any more money from me. Probably all one person sending responses, and a bunch of phony profiles. Learned the hard way.

  51. Wow, it’s a bit unnerving out there. I thought I was ready to pull myself up by my bootstraps and get out there, but maybe being alone a bit longer isn’t so bad after all. Ladies it looks like we are all looking for the same type of man. I know there must be one out there somewhere, but I’m not falling into the dating site scams. Thanks for all your comments. You’ve saved me frustration and money. I’ll stick with family and friends for now. Best of Luck!

  52. Beware, there are several men who don’t post their pic or profile but respond to yours with lots of flattery and want to meet up soon. Then when you meet -you find out it’s just SEX that they are interested in and giving you a ‘story’ that their still living with an ex just for awhile – only a cell phone given no address to reach them – BEWARE – lot’s of men just troiling for “a good time”

    • You’re just finding this out? Oy! Always, always check out the prospective date on Google, etc. The woman who sued because she didn’t know her date was a convicted predator should have done just that; instead she blamed (and sued & won) Match. We’re responsible, not the site. People lie religiously in their profiles. Don’t meet if there is any nagging feeling about your “soul mate” to-be. If it’s there, it means something. A friend of a friend was not the “great guy” my friend knew him as, but then, my friend is a guy and what guys like in their friends (or gals in theirs) don’t always mean you’ll agree. If I sound cynical it’s ’cause I am (he was volubly angry at me because I didn’t finish my dinner? really? yeah, really.)

      • I guess women don’t like sex. And want to get laid. Sure they do hun. Wake up or leave the convent.. So where are the male guys who got stomped on guys who loved their girl to find out they are whore’s open legs for anyone interested. Broken hearts and all. Now how many Whores are on websites. Too many to count I think. Girl get a dildo. Your expectations of men way exceeds your capability of pleasing them. So get a dildo or find a woman like your self and live a happy life.

  53. Interesting comments..I had thought that maybe was different. I had joined an open site 8 months ago only to see that 55 yo men had an age limit of 25-45 years. REALLY..?? I joined OT for a month and have not had much luck. One offer for phone sex, one offer to meet then received an email a few hours later stating he had another date and does not “serial date”, one guy wanted to know if I had a “cheerleader outfit”, a few flirts that I respond to and then no more contact…I have learned there is not much difference between 16 yo boys & 60 yr old men..LOL. Will be cancelling and not joining anymore sites. Wonder where the widely repeated statistic, “1 in 5 people meet their soulmate” comes from??

    • It’s a shame that it has come to the point where no one knows where to turn to. I for one have asked the same question,”where can I find my soulmate”. Please don’t think that there is no difference between a 16 yo boy and a 60 yo man based on a few bad apples. Keep me informed if you come accross a place that has promise.

    • Roseland says:

      As far as where the 1 in 5 comes from, there are lies, damn lies, and statistics.

  54. I wouldn’t pay any dating site, anything. There is no proven track record for any of these sites. No stats of any kind. Now there are the free one’s. Those are the one’s with the misfits of society and women with health issues, drama, baggage and weight problems. Why do you think they are on there? It’s free. This is all relative to my own opinion.

    • None of them are for free. They put out faces half of which left months ago if you want to speak with them you will find they are no longer members. Sucker! I left every site weeks ago and I still get winks and flirts. Total Scam. They use your expired profile to recruit new people so that is how they get so many members. They don’t distinguish between current paying members or the the one’s who are no longer paying.. People no longer paying are a bigger number no doubt about it.

      • Click the ‘Next’ below to begin to take your membership off of automatic credit card billing. When your time expires we will not continue to bill your credit card. Your will continue as a free member and all your emails, photo’s and records relating to your profile will be saved.
        Please tell us why you would like to downgrade your membership?
        I signed up this morning for a $12.99 monthly payment, but was horrified to see $89.20 charged against my card. I am presently on a fixed budget, this means 2 bills will have to go unpaid this month, however, my calculation 12.99 x 6 gives me $77.94, and there is a difference of $11.26 and cannot figure how much percentage is the taxes. I am also surprised that membership fees carry added taxes, this I will research.
        Is there is anything we can do to change your mind?
        Not quite sure

        The New York State Sales and Use Tax Law and Regulations – This book has greatly help in the verification of online membership dues, to which taxes are being charged. However, this book has explained that “A Social Club maintains two types of memberships. Full membership are $15 per year and limited memberships is $5 per year. Since the dues paid by the full members are in excess of $10 per year, all members’ dues is taxable even though some are not more than $10. An Athletic club has two types of membership: Annual membership for $25 per year and life member for $250. A person purchasing a life membership is required to pay tax on the $250 charged for membership at the time of purchase. A Social club operates a Restaurant and a Bar for the use of its members. The Club requires of each member a minimum expenditure of $200 for food and drinks.” So far it seems that taxes are only paid to ‘Social Clubs’ with tangible properties which are beneficial to their clients. Somehow there seems to be some sort of extortion when it comes to online Social settings whereby taxes are being included in their membership fees, such as, then turn around and say that your money is not refundable although you place a request almost immediately after discovering the hefty charges against your credit card.

  55. ALL the online dating sites are FAKE, beware!! most are owned by the same man from Canada. Haven’t you guys noticed most of the profiles are in terrible English? cant believe that many men actually cannot spell or puntuate correctly. A lot of these sites “steal” photos and create profiles, hence the awful English. PLUS I know for a fact after meeting a few on the sites, MOST ARE MARRIED or they have LIED about pretty much everything, age esp. background. YES its sickening too that ugly, redneck, men with NO money “THINK” they can get women 20 years younger. duh guys, ONLY if you have Trumps bank account!!
    Better luck meeting someone at a grocery store than ANY of these “dating” sites, they are a joke and nothing more than a way for someone to get very rich.

    • Jade, interesting comment. Which websites are you refering too? I know that match had tons of scammers and fake profiles. The scammers tried to squeeze money out of me too.


    • Roseland says:

      I agree that the pay sites are crooks. Stick with the free sites. OK Cupid seems to be one of the better free sites.

  56. YES,,,,,,,,,,,NEVER EVER give out your credit card to any of these online dating sites. You will be lucky to EVER get any refund and they will continue to charge your card. ONLY American Express is good about canceling them for good. PLEASE PEOPLE>………..these dating sites are a JOKE and a money maker for the same guy who pretty owns ALL of them, just uses different names for the “dating” sites. He is in Canada, so the BBB wont be of much help here in the states. Also, most of the men on these sites are LOSERS, Married!! or think they are going to get a hot young blonde babe, yea right……………. Good luck to all. I have NO idea where a woman in her 50’s is suppose to meet a nice decent man her age??? :(

  57. Well, that was an interesting read. Thanks for all who responded. I was pretty sure I was done with the sites but now the last spark has been extinguished.

    It was interesting (and disappointing/poignant/sometimes almost funny) to hear of some of the experiences. I guess it can be hard for both genders. My frustrations mainly were concerned with not even getting an acknowledgement that I sent a thoughtful initial email. I’m thinking that’s rude, but that’s just me talking. Yeah, I did get one 10-yr-old, 50 lb-lighter pic (not sure how starting out on a lie makes any sense), but for the most part it was all just about trying to figure out how much of a match there could be.

    Friends/family has panned out. I say Meetup groups might be a good way. At least you’re doing something you want to be doing. I know there is someone who likes motorcycle camping… (8-)

  58. Gale Miller says:

    I paid for your services and met a very nice man back in November 2011 and we are still together….thank you so much for that. However, after we met, I cancelled my membership in December 2011, but you are still billing me…..please stop. I don’t believe I should have been paying these three months after I cancelled. I would like my money back and for you to stop billing me. I am putting a stop on your services with my bank so you can not continue to take my money. I can not find an email address for you so I have to resort to this blog. Beginning to think this is a scam to get money now. Once again…..please stop billing and taking money from my account. I can’t even log onto OurTime because they keep telling me I AM NOT REGISTERED!!!!! I AM NOT A MEMBER!!!! Ok… stop!!!! Enough said!

  59. The Best way to stop billing is to go in and switch debit card numbers to an acct that you KNOW only has $ 5.00 in it at any given time,,,,Works everytime I keep 1 acct just for that purpose. :)

  60. I have now been on this site for over 3 months. I have not met anyone who is worth my time or money. It seems most men here are the bottom of the barrel…out of work, out of shape and are bankrupt in the character department. Worst of all the amount of scammers and fraudulent profiles is astounding! Beware of ANY MAN who says he is a widower. They are getting more clever and have cleaned up their English, but they are phony nonetheless.

  61. Hey Shelley,

    Match is also notorious for posting phony trumped up profiles. And yes,
    BEWARE if they state they are widowers. It’s digusting. The real widowers get the shaft. I am a widow and I seek a widower, but now I do not know who to trust. The scammers usually have an age range of 40-60, that being said
    it somewhat of a guideline to detect the scammers. Either way I am thinking this is not the way to look for the last love of my life.


  62. I have been on this site for a few weeks. I signed up for one month just to try it. There are a lot of older men that seem nice but you never know. The reason I am writing this review is to tell all the women out there thinking of using this site is to **beware** of scammers who pretend to be soldiers from Afghanistan, saying they are using someone else’s profile due to security reasons. Oh they make it sound real good…even sending pictures of soldier’s embracing their kids!! How despicable!!!
    I gave one my email…(I opened separate email account just to receive emails from this site ) after reading one email it was obvious English was not their first language. So I figured it out quickly and blocked any further communication. Then just today as I was online another chat popped up with the same come line. Well, you can imagine what I told him…lol So be careful ladies and happy hunting!

  63. I totally agree with Penny and some of the others above. Upon joining I was immediately contacted by men requesting my personal information (phone number, email, address). When I refused or ignored them they were rude and demeaning! I also found that many sent auto-messages (not real replies) or were not the person shown in the profile (two admitted to me that “that’s not me…send me your personal info because I can’t make my own profile here”). What’s that all about?!

    Today was the last straw! I signed on and a man IMMEDIATELY contacted me saying he was a police officer and I needed to trust him and send my personal info! Any decent man, especially a good police officer, would not recommend a woman giving out this info to a stranger!

    I have already told my friends DO NOT SUBSCRIBE TO THIS SITE and I make the same recommendation to all of you! Stay safe!

  64. Thanks for the heads up. I almost sent money until I read all these comments. The men seemed so sincere and the photos real. I got so many nice responses–it was a real ego boost. To find out its just a scam is so disheartening.

  65. Ha! Thanks for all of your honest commentary – I was nearing the end of my ban on Internet dating & was thinking about trying it again. It seems like it will always be the same old story on these sights, with one’s authenticity no more convincing than if presented in a bar at 2am. At least then we can see what we’re getting right away. I’ve recently cancelled my Facebook account, in an attempt at sticking to more organic forms of communication, & with that I’ll leave finding my Mr. Right to fate and a happy coincidence. Be safe and well everyone.

  66. If this gets posted to the online dating thread then I would like to add my comments. First of all if you are concern about online dating then maybe you sh ould not be seqarching the internet in the first place and find a date the old fashion way. I resent that is is a scam because I have met some real nice woman, who are swincere and know what it is that they way in life and are not desprate to meet anyone. I would not ask a woman for contact information unless she offers it. Most of the time it is given willingly. There are scams everywhere but you just have to use your common since when giving your personal information. Life is too short to live in a bottle. So I disagree with every comment here that is negative. I know I am not the only legitimate male on the site. I am on the site and do not mind giving my screeen name because I am human and not interested in peronsal information. I have been a member since 2001 maybe on related sties and have never had a negative charge to my account. I wish all the ladies good luck int thier quest and if need be write and I will let know if you are being led down a shady path. I do not mind helping you avoid a creep or heartache down the road. One last comment seniorpeoplemeet seem to have changed thier website to ourtime. You can still access seniorpeoplemeet but emails will come from I was confused at firat but I stayed with seniorpeoplemeet because that is what I am sue to.

  67. Well sorry I had to repost because of all the spelling errors. I do not want you to think I am some out of towner.

    If this gets posted to the online dating thread then I would like to add my comments. First of all if you are concern about online dating then maybe you should not be searching the internet in the first place and find a date the old fashion way. I resent that is a scam because I have met some real nice woman, who are sincere and know what it is that they way in life and are not desperate to meet anyone. I would not ask a woman for contact information unless she offers it. Most of the time it is given willingly. There are scams everywhere but you just have to use your common since when giving your personal information. Life is too short to live in a bottle. So I disagree with every comment here that is negative. I know I am not the only legitimate male on the site. I am on the site and do not mind giving my screen name because I am human and not interested in personal information. I have been a member since 2001 maybe on related sites and have never had a negative charge to my account. I wish all the ladies good luck in their quest and if need be write and I will let know if you are being led down a shady path. I do not mind helping you avoid a creep or heartache down the road. One last comment seniorpeoplemeet seem to have changed their website to ourtime. You can still access seniorpeoplemeet but emails will come from I was confused at first but I stayed with seniorpeoplemeet because that is what I am use to.

    • @ wilric49……if these sites are so great, and you have met such wonderful women,then why after 11 years are you still a memeber???? Maybe your one of the scammer / players we are being warned about????? JUST SAYING!


      • You got it. 100% Keep it up girl. It’s obvious for one he’s an idiot who even after a text full of misspelled words he came back and could not spell words correctly after he said he corrected them. LOL! He will be hunting for women under a different handle most probably over seas. I am not a judge but women stay away from this idiot as you can.

      • Stephanie you have to be a little more optimistic and not bias. There are just as many women players as there are men. Everyone wants the next person to be the last. We are at a age now where change is hard and tolerance is low. I do all I can to make things possible. Scammers dont go on vacations to Italy. It was a lovely trip.

    • More like a out of country ‘er Nigeria perhaps? Man you can’t spell at a 6th grade level. Complete moron.

  68. The Best Free dating site to use is

    I have used many dating sites in the past and the only dating site that worked for me was emeraldmatch the first day i got flirts and emails all of there members are real people . Yes i paid $19 dollars but its worth it every other dating site that i joined in the past wanted $149. So if you want a nice dating site my best bet is to try out here is the link

  69. Mario im going to check out and tell you if i like it ok

  70. Phil: I am considering a over 50 website. Live in L.V. Like camping. biking, hiking, cards, board games & men on motorcycles. Went to bike week Az two years in a row. Did not meet a guy looking for a near 60 (in shape) lady… Saw a great REO concert & had a great time with my two bff’s though. Saw Carlos Santana sat. night house of blues too. If you have single friends in l.v. HELP!

  71. I didn’t have a good experience with this site.
    They overcharged me from very beginning. If you apply when they offer you discount 25% do not believe it. They charged me regular price and when I wrote them two times, I haven’t received any answer so far. Also chat system is slow.

  72. I feel bad that so many woman have had the same negative experiences as me on dating sites. BUT I do need to say that in the years I’ve been on them (mostly free sites ex: OKCupid) I’ve met some REAL guys and actually had a year long relationship with one and made good friends with another. So there are real possibilities on them. But you must be careful of the scammers and if they don’t email you back, don’t be hurt, most likely they aren’t real or are married, just put there as draws for us or guys “checking the waters”, so to speak. GOOD LUCK LADIES! Don’t stop looking for love, I won’t! :0)

    • Roseland says:

      I’m also on OK Cupid and there have been instances where I sent emails and the women never responded. Ok, fine. I just figured they weren’t interested and I moved on . I don’t see the advantage to a free site like OKC of putting up fake profiles. If OKC were a pay site, I see how they’d want to suck you in wh phony profiles and start paying. Let’s face it, everybody is not going to be a match for everybody else so we can reasonably expect that there will be those who will not respond to our emails. .

  73. the free weekends and phony profiles are awful, I know there are some good men out there, but have many liars and losers. It would be great if after sending a thoughtful e mail that you receive a real e mail back.I wish chemistry which is quite expensive wou8ld screen the profiles-I will call then-Judy in Mass.

  74. many phonies and liars and fake profiles on the expensive chemistyr website. Free weeknds attract losers and liars-I will habve to call chemisstry-Judy in Ma

  75. Your best bet when paying for these sites is to use a virual credit card so it can not be recharged without your permission as you need a new experation date. Card is only good for a month. I use it all the time for any order that I am not sure about or do not want the auto renew done on them–my true card number is never known. Be safe ladies…

  76.  Here is a response from OurTime regarding this:

     Our Response (Jason) 05/17/2012 06:18 PM
    Dear Member,
    Thank you for contacting our Customer Care team today. In order to read and send messages and instant chats with one another on the site, both members must have paid memberships. There is no feature on the site that tells you if a profile is a paying or non-paying member. Without viewing your Inbox, you will not be able to see if you have gotten a message from a paid member, or a flirt from a non-paying member.
    Regarding your billing question, if you do not wish to renew for another month, you can turn off your automatic renewal at any time before your account is set to renew. I suggest doing this at least 24-48 hours before your renewal date to ensure you are not charged again.
    If there is anything else I can assist you with, please reply to this email and I will be happy to do so.
    Warm Regards,
    Customer Care Specialist
     Customer By Email 05/17/2012 01:40 AM
    Do both members need to be an upgraded subscriber to send and read messages sent?
    How can I, as a regular member, tell if I have an email or flirt from an upgraded member vs a non-upgraded member?
    Are upgraded member’s profiled marked or noted as upgraded, so I know if they can reply to my emails before I send them?

    BOTH MEMBERS must be an upgraded member to send and read messages

    You must be an upgraded member to read Flirts that are sent to you.
    Even if you pay for an upgrade, there is no way to tell if the other member has upgraded and will be able to read a message you send them.

    • So there free membership is to show a couple of faces that may or may not be legit and send you a bill to “correspond” to them but if that person is not a paying member you cannot post to them? so post some beautiful women on the site and then try to message them and they say “sorry this person is not a paying member” So any lawyers next question will be then why did you not delete them from your site? Any continuation of any body not under a free trial after they stopped paying would be automatically an invasion of their privacy. I have never paid them a dime. You should file a class action lawsuit. If they are putting up peoples profiles and telling you they are non paying members. It’s a breech of contract on their part and secondly an invasion of privacy on the parties you are reading about that according to them are non paying members.

      • Roseland says:

        I once saw two “different” profiles on a pay site but they both used the exact same picture. How does that work? Twin sisters perhaps? :D


    • Roseland says:

      A flirt, a wink, or a grunt means that somebody is too stupid or too lazy to write something.

    • Same thing happen to me. Tons of men out of state and the ones in state say 40 miles is too far. Don’t join this site it’s a fake. Many men are widowers and want your personal email right away. I will never give a good reference for this site it’s a waste of time and money.

  78. @ wilric49……if these sites are so great, and you have met such wonderful women,then why after 11 years are you still a memeber???? Maybe your one of the scammer / players we are being warned about????? JUST SAYING!


  79. I’ve tried eharmony, match and pof in the past year with some success, match actually worked best for me. You might consider There are many groups that meet for various activities. I just joined a singles baby boomer group in Central Florida. It looks like a good way to meet people for dating or just for new friendships. Good luck!

  80. I’ve tried both free and pay sites and am currently on a pay site, but not OurTime. I’ve gone on a few dates … Some guys have the funniest stories about their dating adventures…. I’m not exactly sure what I am looking for but so far I have not found it online… Some guy’s profiles crack me up … No Drama … Walk on the beach … Cuddle by a fire …I suppose I’m looking for something a little more original .. Lately I realize that I have a better time going out with the girls … lots of laughs and just a good time all around.. Having said that I think there’s hope for all of us.. I’m not sure it is online dating though :) … Also found the local Meet Up gatherings to fall short of my expectations … Nobody said it would be easy… Hang in there …

  81. Hope springs eternal but
    1.Why can’t men respond with at least a “thank you for your interest” ? At least I would know that they received my e-mail. I should not have to pay more to verify that it was received. Is it not the obligation of the site to forward it when you pay to join?
    2. Why do some men expect you to answer without filling out a profile or posting a picture?
    3. Can’t figure out why some men post slovenly pictures. What are they thinking?
    I’ve been on several sites….all discouraging.

    • I had one lady send me her high school pic. That was 30 years ago. When I met het she was five feet tall laying down. The fat was OMG bad. I dropped her like a hot rock

  82. I just signed up at ourtime…its aweful. It is poorly designed and lacking members. Plus I didnt know it was for 6 months….its very misleading. Theres noway to back out once your in. I called my bank, to dispute charge but it yakes three days till charges show up. If your considering signing up…buyer beware.

    • You have to send the company a formal letter and they will take ypou off there list. read the fine print and it worked for me

  83. Thank you everyone for confirming what I’ve been finding on these dating sites. I’ve met some men at least I think there men who I will be having a conversation with one minute and the next be gone. I get lots of flirts or they say they like my photo. In fact they will push the button on all photos and each one will show up in the inbox. When I would respond I wouldn’t hear anything back. I believe most are LIARS,SCAMMERS,PREDATORS, there maybe just a few good men out there but I haven’t found any.

  84. Yes there are some loser people on these sites. But I found true love and it worked for me. I did not have time to go and do the bar thing. Dont drink anyway. I went through a stack of profiles but if you look hard enough you will find someone. All of us guys are not creeps and jerks. I was single cause I am widowed. I heard from from enough women out there that just wanted money and some poor jerk to pay there bar bill for them. You find find the good ones but your are going to get a stack of bull with them.

  85. This is exactly what’s wrong with dating websites today. They charge WAY too much for people to just interact with each other. If they expect people to sign up and actually use their service over something like Facebook, they need to get a grip on the whole “taking advantage of lonely people” thing.

  86. It is so sick when the websites say, Christian Dating. All they are out for is money. They could care less what kind of person you are. I was on one for free and there were always “kids” on there putting other women’s pics and fake descriptions only to make rude or nasty comments to another person. No offense, but it seems 95% of the women on the sites are overweight; I know I am going to get a nasty reply from someone on here so please save it; I know…….you can’t judge a book by it’s cover, but I would hardly like to be with someone going down a WalMart aisle in a motorized wheel chair with a big smile on their face and wondering what everyone else is thinking. Honestly, I know what I think when I see that. Sorry, but i don’t want to spend the rest of my life living like a nurse or an orderly. If i would be able to find someone I would want to enjoy a walk in the evening with both of us having our feet planted on the ground and not walking with the other one on wheels.And the old……..take me for what I am saying doesn’t work either; you have to wake up with that person in the mornings! Just sayin.

  87. I live in a relatively small town, so matches close to me on most dating sites are hard to come by. I did briefly consider OurTime, but I noticed that I was receiving a lot of matches who supposedly lived in my little town and other small towns nearby. Not very likely. So please beware of OurTime, but don’t give up on finding a good man. There are still a few out there. Good luck.

  88. Skybird says:

    I too was duped by the site and its members. I do not plan on chatting online (to much of a time killer) and if you suggest to meet for coffee/tea, they disappear. Or if they show up they’re not what they say they are ( heavier & older). They do want your phone number or address. Canned flirts, no pictures and little to no information. These men seem to fit the old saying they want a nurse or purse, with a role in the hay thrown in!! What drives me crazy is the “matches” they send you. I requested within 75 miles and I get 3000+ miles. No smoking and I get daily smokers. Where have all the mannerly men gone to? I’m going to pull my info form the site & chalk it up to experience.

  89. Taking the tour and looking at ads for “OurTime”; for singles at 50+…as I do in every similar situation, I cannot help but notice that every woman depicted is a good 20 years younger than the man in the photo. SOS different day. Still about men dating down!

  90. saffron says:

    I signed up for ourtime and paid for 1 month just to really see what it was all about. I live in a very large metro area and there are tons of men who are on the site. I am now in my second week and have met one man so far who was nice. My feeling about this site is that there are many more lurkers (non-paying members) than actual paid subscribers. It seems like it is a hobby for a lot of guys to send a “flirt” or “love your photo” and that is it. I responded to someone who did that because he was very close to where I live and sent him an actual e-mail and just got another “love your photo” e-mail which to me indicated he was not a paid subscriber or he would have answered with an actual e-mail instead of the canned responses which are available to all. Therefore, I really believe many are not really wanting to meet people or they would pay. This is a site where you MUST PAY TO REALLY CONNECT WITH PEOPLE. I am really not disappointed with ourtime itself as I feel the concept is great for 50+ people. I guess I am disappointed that so many people on there are just lurkers. But I am just taking it all with a grain of salt and glad I did not pay for the entire 6 months.

  91. B, to comment on me being a idiot maybe yes replying to you. But since we are expressing ourselves, I can tell what of woman you are. I am not going to get into name calling since I know you enough troubles. I would like to go to Nigeria but dont think I can stand the heat. Dont be so negative or live your life alone. Women are beautiful no matter what shape or size. Its thier personality that makes them unattractive.

  92. Ok…I just pulled my photos and info from Our TIme. What I began to notice is that the ones that wanted to know you only ended up asking your for money (scammers). And the ones that looked interesting to me…never answered back. I guess I am old school and I need to look a man in the eyes before I give him my phone number.

    Lesson Learned: You need to meet someone face to face…technology is just a cold substitute.

  93. Here in Portland OR, a lot of folks use a site called POF (plenty of fish) and it is really free…now the search feature sucks as u can only search age and distance and then for an extra fee (totally optional) one can gain more features (fair enough, I think)…I have not met anyone yet (I am 65) but some do respond. I really am tired of looking at faces and “about me” but we all want to happy, right? and there are different strokes for all. I do not get out there much, don’t drink hardly at all so my options are limited….I’ll let u all know how it goes….

  94. I had been a paying member on Our Time and had several ladies interested, that is until it was time to meet or talk on the phone. Had a few ladies who flirted with me and after I answered with a nice email, never heard from them or was told No thank you, not my type!! Then why flirt???? Am 57 and still looking, as it seems many here in the Kitsap area are looking for a man with lots of money, tall (ok so you are 5’3′ and need a man 6′ or taller???), wants to travel the world. Well good luck, I still hold hope that I will find one who isn’t all tied up in looks and materialism, but rather would look at the heart and personality, those things last, looks usually don’t!!!!!

  95. I received a message from a male stating “If you are interested, I would love to hear from you.” I glanced at the “about me” portion of his profile posted above the message and it read, “I’m looking for a sex partner who will be willing at all times and willing to go for an hour if need be.” I blocked him, read the Our Time Terms and Conditions to be sure that this was unacceptable behavior and sent Our Time a message requesting that “in light of these circumstances, credit my credit card for the amount of time left in my subscription.” Our Time sent me an email response requesting that I telephone them. I did and was told that they do not grant refunds under any circumstances and thanked me for making them aware of this man’s profile. I was surprised to find that Our Time does not actively police its site; yet, it does appreciate it when members make it aware of inappropriate behavior. Up to that point I’d been only marginally satisfied with Our Time. When I joined Our Time I requested to receive matches with men in my area. Some of the same matches were sent to me multiple times. Although Our Time’s matches were local men, I received flirts and messages from men all over the U.S. The blatant request for sex was the final straw. I do not recommend Our Time to anyone.

  96. BEWARE OF OURTIME.COM!!! I never signed up for this site, but suddenly I see 2 charges on my credit card. This is a total scam. After signing up with, this company somehow was able to get my information. OURTIME./COM charged me twice on my credit card. A BUNCH OF CROOKS!!

  97. Just read all of the reviews. Scary to say the least. The only reason I am on is because I live in a rural community, run a ranch and don’t get out much..don’t have the time. I am thinking maybe it is all up to us and our decision making. Anyone who would share their e mail address, phone number etc. is a desperate woman. If a man does not have the patience to wait a suitable time..what does that say from the get go? meeting the person? if he shows up and is not what he says he is..leave immediately. What does that say?..don’t know…thinking about all of this…

  98. This site is TERRIBLE! And the company absolutely refuses to stand behind their product. After 4 days I knew this was not the site for me and did not feel safe continuing to use it, yet the company refused to issue any refund at all on a 6 month contract (the only way to try the service is sign up for 6 months, prepaid). DO NOT VENTURE ONTO THIS SITE! You will be disappointed. Nowhere near the quality of other dating sites.

  99. Does anyone have a phone number for this outfit. Try emailing them. Good luck. Long story, but if you have any problems with them..head straight to the BBB. I have to agree, I have met nicer guys on the free sites.

  100. Could you please email me on how much it cost to join Our

    • i signed onto for a month at 20.00. got some dates and phone calls and found less scammers than was full of scammers–it got to be funny after a while. One guy I talked to from match said he came across some female scammers and they were easy to spot. The male scammers were easy to. I like Ourtime better. Match is a little more expensive.

      • Isabel, I agree 100% with you. If I could just see the message, I might pay one month.
        I could I ever say “I’m looking for a husband” unless I met someone and the only reason the marry is for love. Maybe all of them are scams. I’m frustrated.

      • hOW Do you spot scammers as I’m new to this…

    • It was my suggestion to this site that they allow new users to read the first few “flirts”, say 3-5, without paying a fee. I received a “flirt” within 15 minutes of registering for free but would never pay to see it. (BTW, you can send a flirt without paying.) Seems to me that, unless people are really desperate, it would be more advantageous to allow a couple of free contacts before forcing one to pay. They lost me through their policy.

    • These sites are set-up as dating sites, however if you read the TOS of most of them it clearly states that it is for entertainment purposes and “some” of the profiles are made up and communications between them and you is meant to stimulate more interaction between you and the site. Here is one I copied from a popular web site… READ THE TOS before paying…

      “You understand and accept that our site, while built in the form of a personals service, is an entertainment service. All profiles are provided for the amusement and entertainment of our members and our users. You are not guaranteed that you will find a date, a companion, or an activity partner, or that you will meet any of our members in person.”

  101. yes please do let is know how much it costs. If I pay 20.00 for a month how can I cancel
    if I change my mind? there is no information and when I log on it tells me the sites don’t match. I can’t send money to something I don’t understand

    • sandy–you can check your account and it tells you when your time expires and then opt to call in person to cancel or cancel online under your ‘account’ feature. I got off Match twice and now i am on–Isabel

  102. this money charging is f#cked up.

  103. Why is it that almost all of the males I see on Ourtime are Catholic, or Christian? What gives?

    • I am on Ourtime paid subscriber. I am still looking. Some contacts so far, no real connection.. But iam here! james

  104. Ourtime is a rip off. I joined and all the “members” who contacted me are fake people. I tried to get a refund and they refused. Don’t waste your money on this site.

    • Cher—i actually found real people on Ourtime and have been in contact by telephone with a couple of them, I found more fakes on Match than ourtime. what gives?

    • Cher, I agree 100%. Our time is loaded with scammers!

      • Michele, I agree with you. Ourtime was a waste of time. Some flirts/messages were from people in my area; many were not. One guy’s profile said he lived in my area, but when we began chatting via the Ourtime website I found out he lived at least 5 hours away in another state. After I got a blatant request for sex I contacted Ourtime and asked that they cancel my subscription and refund the remaining balance. They refused. Oh, they did thank me for alerting them to the sicko.

  105. I ha e not joind or signes up, uet fojnd my profile here. How about 100+ messagea before i complete a profile. I found rhis bery odd. Keep me posted
    I am not joinimg jowever qoild like to fins ojr howh profile ended ip on their site.

  106. I’m glad that I looked at the comments on this blog before I signed up for “Our Time”. I think that is a rip off. It’s sad that these companies prey on peoples loneliness and desire to find someone. What was the outcome on contacting ‘ourtime’? We have to be very alert for rip offs, they are out there in droves!

  107. sydney Perry says:

    Something kept bothering my mind. I signed up for Our time and in no time I had accumulated a lot of messages and flirts only for that to stop in a matter of days. Though I am not yet a paying member, I am still able to access my account but what am not sure of is if my account is still visible to members. Am asking this because I don’t want to make the mistake of paying to a site where I will no longer get anymore response. Please can anyone en lighting me more on this?

  108. Thought I try an “older” dating site and all I can say is; Scammers Rome freely on this site!! Be smart don’t join and you will be thankful for this tip.
    I complained about one in particular scammer and next thing I know his face is plastered as new subscriber, same photo but differant name,
    Be careful .

  109. People find various dating sites either good or bad depending on their experience or from what they have heard.What works for one person may not work for another person. You may find your soul mate on one dating site and your pal may find theirs on a dating site you considered bad. You should be sure of what you want before paying any money.

  110. I think most of you are right….big waste of money and time. Way to many e-mails from out of state that seem to only want your personal e-mail address for gawd knows what scam. Think I better stick with family. I think after 60 you are rarely going to find anyone. Most older men looking for 40 or 50 year old anyway.

  111. Funny, all the guys that contacted me had a sad story of wives and children dying in horrible accidents, They tell you how great there relationship was with the spouse 15 years ago. They seem to travel from Slidell, La to Texas and all of them have fascinating careers of importance, yet no women. What a freaking joke.

  112. I’ve subscribed to Match and others and the men were all losers or scammers. They are bums or leeches just looking for a woman to support them. Or they are men that have anger issues, gambling issues, or just plain selfish. These sites just waste your hard earned dollars. Don’t get your hopes up because nothing good will probably come of it.

  113. I just checked out the profiles using an external search and substituted different town names in the address bar…..viola! All the same photos with different towns. Obviously a misleading site.

    You have been warned folks :)

  114. I am going to purchase a P/Paid visa card for $25.00 and pay the one mtn.fee for Ourtime dating, this way how much can the scam me, if i am not happy with my flits and mess. I will just use the card up before they can bill me again also i would never never give my real credit card information to any company on any site. That is why people get ripped off. Monty

    • Monty did they accept your “PP Visa card?” I had the same idea, but a friend told me that all only accept true CC’s.

      I’m a first time poster to the site and to single sites in general. Was eager to subscribe to see all the emails (over 30 in less than a week), but after reading everything on this site I have concerns. Just really don’t understand what happen to the world and their need to dup people for the almighty dollar. :-/

  115. I was “scammed” on have been with them for 2 yrs…I religiously provided them with 5 Emails a month, that I kept track of and was even told “you’ve done great,” how about some more..The first time I had to argue with them, I did not answer a “pop up” question, which I never received on my screen, and they gave it to me..The second time I satisfied their “so called guarantee” of six months free, even though I went above and beyond my 5 Emails a month, which I kept track of, they charged my credit card $119.86..My guarantee screen was no longer visible, since I satisfied their requirement, but they charged my credit card $119.86..When I talked to several reps and finally a supervisor, they stuck with their story, that I did not X the box which read..”Did you meet your soulmate..”, which never came up…

  116. Does anyone have information on OurTime management staff? I have asked how does communicating with inactive members work and why inactive members are included in my daily matches. All I get are canned responses explaining how to use their website. I know how to use the website, yet, there’s nothing that addresses communicating wth an inactive member. Bottom line, there is no communicating with an inactive member, and if that’s the case, the inactive profiles should be removed. All they care about is getting the money, and I’m about to send a letter to the Better Business Bureau. Maybe that will get their attention.

    • eharmony does the same thing – matching you with inactive members – it’s actually in their terms and conditions that they will “on occasion match you with inactive members” or words to that effect. No logic of course other then to inflate your responses – after two years of off and on use I’m thinking all of these dating services – paid or free have issues. Use with caution and have fun!

      • Kelly Netzenheim says:

        I agree with most of these posts. I was on for two years and then e-harmony for three years. Most men on these sites are from the two extremes; either good catches but looking for rich Barbie dolls, or total losers with addictions, weird religions, fat and ugly, multiple girlfriends, ect, ect. And scammers? They are everywhere, and some are laughably blatant about it. Adorable 25-year olds from foreign countries declaring their preference for 50 somethings? Um . . . . . . yeah, right!
        Also hate those who say, Oh, why don’t you join a church, take a class, volunteer, on and on, to meet someone. What you find is married church members, married classmates, married volunteers. Sometimes I believe there are unhappily married people out there, but will not leave their spouses until they have someone waiting in the wings, and that means entering into a relationship with a married man, something I am not quite (due to my personal morals) ready to do. But getting desparate . . . . . . .I want a boyfriend!

    • so trrue, yoou should not be charged if your profile is hidden and you can not receive any messages or flirts. alot of scammers, and too many profiles with no p ictures and no information.. if you tell them you are going to quit, you will receive so many views on your site with no time at all, all from the company . trying to get you back.

  117. Maybe this site is the best path to start an honest relationship. For myself, I have never joined any dating sites, just want to chat, hear other outlooks and opinions about life, philosophy, maybe even politics.

    Obviously those dating sites do not work for many. And having to pay for nothing, seems outrageous. I wonder if there is any site just to get friends; nothing else.

    • Georgina, you and Kelly express my frustrations and concerns with dating sites perfectly. Like you, I would love to chat with well-educated, accomplished members of the opposite sex without the narrow preconceptions of a dating site. Unfortunately, open chatrooms are usually monopolized by scatalogical morons, and open listings expose the members to spam and scams. I have found no answer to date.

      Here is why I do not subscribe to any dating site: all of them are at bottom businesses, and very lucrative ones at that. In my area, there are far more than 2,000 Match subscribers for men alone. Multiply that times 50 major urban areas at $20 a month = $2 million. Now double that for women =$4 million from one city alone (and that vastly understates the number of subscribers; the real number is probably closer to $8 -10 million per month). For the entire nation, a large dating service generates at least $50-100 million a year, most of which is net profit (the costs of maintenace are relatively low). And that doesn’t count the added fees you mentioned. Many of these dating services are even publicly listed companies. Get the picture. Their focus is on making money, not matching people. That they use phony profiles (an unethical practice in my book) to stimulate subscriber interest only underscores the point.

  118. I also was disappointed in OurTime. The site was hard for me to navigate (technology-wise). Although I could see my picture, apparently no one else could. And I couldn’t chat on-line. Foolishly, I paid $71 to join for six months, only to cancel my membership ten minutes after joining out of frustration. I only received canned answers to my questions — could not figure out how to speak to a human being at OurTIme. If one can speak to a human being, the ability to do so is not prominently displayed anywhere — at least, I could not find it (and I looked).

    • Kelly Netzenheim says:

      I hear your frustration. I, too, have had bad luck with these sites. I have joined several, one thing I have noticed is at the beginning, you get a lot of interest from other members, but it fades away after a while. Makes me wonder if there are ‘fake profiles’ (maybe maintained by employees of the site?) to hook you in at first. Anyone else get this feeling?

  119. Roger Strange Jr. says:

    eHarmony/ Would like to know how you got my acc and how you were able to debit my acc for $53.97 . I’ve never subscribe or ever intend to subscribe this is not going unnoticed, this will be reported.

  120. Roger Strange Jr. says:

    Every body I’m inclined to believe this whole sight is a SCAM and action should be taken…

  121. If you click upon “upcoming birthdays” , you’ll see that about 80%of the profiles, display no pictures. This is really bewildering.

  122. Monty, I was thinking of trying the Our Time Dating site when I read your comment. I just did not feel real secure about all of this and your comment about using a one time charge card was great. I will try that and do it for one month what can it hurt? right, Kala

  123. If another site is actually less successful than OURTIME.Com then I am in trouble. As a decent, fit gentleman, I registered my profile & pictures. I receive flirts from older or out of shape women. I have initiated sending messages to nice looking women who I felt I was compatible with. Most ignored me, maybe 15% responded. Then of the 15% I may have received one or two E-mails exchanged and then it stops. The most annoying is when a women says to me that she would like to hear more about me or get to know me better and I send them a sincere message & do not hear back from them. This has happened from the 15% that I was fortunate to hear anything from.. I think OURTIME has been a whole lot of nothing for me and I hoped there was something better.

    • I think the reason you don’t get responses is because the women aren’t paying members and are unable to do anything but a wink. I have been on
      and off for a couple of years and have had the same experience. All things considered; a waste of time & money. Go take ballroom dance lessons or go to wine tastings!

      • Kelly Netzenheim says:

        Yup, tried dance classes and wine tasting. Met great people; married couples, boyfriend-girlfriend couples, lesbian and gay couples. All great people, but NO SINGLES! When I would mention I was single and looking, I got one response from a married woman, she had a single uncle. Agreed to a blind date. Guy was about 100 pounds overweight, comb-over hair (you know, growing hair long from one side to comb over a bald head) had no interests or hobbies other than a weird fascination with, I am not kidding, Snoopy from the Peanuts cartoon strip. All he could talk about, wanted to show me his collection. Huh?
        Sometimes wish I was immoral enough to start an affair with a married man. Gee, think I am lonely?

    • I only pay for a month at a time and then when it is a a reduced rate. I am up front, decent, and honest but the women are either so horribly out of shape and talking about how they exercise and eat right or they are too good to be true.

  124. I’ve only been on this site for 3 days and I’m going to take down my profle. I have the same problems as many of you mentioned. Men sending flirts, liking your profile and liking your photos, but they don’t include a message, just the same canned responses over and over again. Men from out-of-State. The same man sending you up to 10 messages a day, each one more urgent than the last one, and then getting pissed off when you don’t respond. Sheesh, I feel like I’m being cyber-stalked, and it’s probably by men that don’t even exist. At least I only signed up for one month. If you still want to sign up after all these negative comments, make sure you go into “My Account” and disable the automatic renewal option. Then print the page and keep it in a safe place. You may need it if they “accidentally” keep chargng you. Your credit card compnay will help you get a credit. At least mine did.

    I’m giving up on-line dating. Several of you mentioned I signed up for that. At least you meet real people while doing something you like.

    • I checked in here to see what the comments were for Ourtime and glad I did because I’m NOT going there!! I haven’t seen anyone mention Plenty O Fish site. Personally, for several months I got on and off that (easy and “pain-free” to do and it’s FREE), met a couple men that I didn’t hit it off with and then gave up but maybe I’m too old to please anyway…?! I’m sure others have had better luck….Kathy: your comment about feeling like you were being “cyber stalked by men that don’t even exist” is unfortunate, but that off the cuff comment made me laugh out loud – sorry… {: /

      • Kelly Netzenheim says:

        Plenty of Fish is free, but be very wary. Lots of total losers and scammers. If you do not live in a large city where you can be fairly anonymous, consider using a ‘nickname’ and icon for your picture. If you meet any serious possibilities, tell them you can e-mail a picture (set up an e-mail account specifically for this purpose). This way you protect yourself. I speak from experience!

      • Kelly Netzenheim provide good advise, but just like me… most people are not interested in viewing anyone showing an “icon” pic. (automatic red flag of “what else are you trying to hide”) A friend keeps trying to encourage me to get on “POF,” but the one time I visited all I was seeing were pictures that should be up on the post office walls or those thinking posting pictures of bare chests next to a “bathtub” jacuzzi is HOT…. so not. Outside of this… those that she has connected with are awesome up front, but once the physical meeting takes place the true colors start to shine brighter. :-/

  125. Match is scamming as well… I’ve had the same thing happened as Phil… what’s going on! This is HORRIBLE!!

  126. Barry Stephens says:

    All these sites pay women to chat and MSG you so to keep you paying as a member. These women are NOT REAL. When you try to get an actual date they are ‘ too busy’ and disappear. Total waste of time and money.

    • Kelly Netzenheim says:

      I believe you are right. I have had the same experience. I, too, think they pay people to get you hooked into thinking someone is interested in you, then they are gone.

      • Good advive, Kelly. Maybe a group of us should get together and create a real, honest dating site for us seniors! We may even get a write up in AARP!

        Yes, I am single and like you, would like to have a girlfriend….well, boyfriend for you…haha

        No, don’t alter your morals and date a married man….stick to what you believe

  127. Forgot to mention that I agree “Meetup” is quite a GOOD site – has countless groups that actually EXIST attended by actual people you can meet up with because YOU ARE ALL INTERESTED IN THE SAME THING…like horse-back riding, hiking trips for folks within certain age groups (I’m in an over 50 hiking group) surfing, dining out, dancing, theater – you name it. Again, it’s a great way to meet friends with the same interests. Check it out…!

    • Kelly Netzenheim says:

      I did a Meet-up group, you are right, they are a great place to actually meet REAL people. However, all the single women were in the same boat as me, looking for single men and not finding them. Plus, I was in a group from a very large city, and rarely met the same people twice, so didn’t really connect with anyone long term (friend-wise, I mean). But otherwise, good overall.

  128. After I built my profile but before I paid any money I got two flirt messages as other people have described. I paid to see them and one was clearly a scam and the other was clearly a shill for the web site. Since then I have contacted real people on the site but I still think it sucks they feel it necessary to employ shills to get you to pay.

  129. Another issue I noticed is this is not like gmail or facebook in that any button you touch on a person’s profile sends them an e-mail. It is really creepy. just opening and looking at a profile sends that person a notice. There is a favorites button that I stupidly though I could use to organize my search but no, it sends a bad canned e-mail telling the person you are their favorite. really creepy. I ended up sending follow up messages just to apologize. So my advice if you want to use ourtime is to just use direct messages and don’t press any other buttons.

    • Exactly!!!! I’ve done the same thing! Then they’ll email and chew me up for not responding, when I didn’t want to flirt in the first place!

  130. I found out that by using ourtime, and telling the ladies that you also have a facebook, they can also check out ur pictures, and also your family, and can send you a message there for —–FREE.

    Something for free—-imagine that—it’s free………………

    • Kelly Netzenheim says:

      Yup, I kind of thought of the same thing, but then creeps and scammers can get info on your FB friends and family. Anyone else see a way around this?

  131. Katie Mac says: was a waste of time the first time I tried it in early 2012. All the ads and online promotional information indicated it had grown. It is not as populated as, and I keep getting dozens one line ‘click’ flirts from members all over the country, even though my profile states no long distance. These flirts are put in the same email message box as serious emails, making culling through all the inputs to find serious email communications both time consuming and frustrating! And, most of the gents on have no profile, just a line or two, asking you to send them a message. They don’t seem serious for a fee-based online service. is simply not effective in the area I am currently located in, and it’s features fall short of the price you pay. At this time, I recommend you pass on

    • Kelly Netzenheim says:

      Thanks, Katie. I was thinking of joining Our time but think I will pass. I have been divorced ten years now, was on both and e-harmony for years and could write a book on how disappointing it all was. What’s a girl to do?

      • Just Me [Steve] says:

        You sound like a nice person. Frustrated, but nice.
        I’d like a chance to correct the injustice of those joke dating sites by asking you out but, how would we begin? How would we communicate on an open forum such as this yet still preserve each of our privacy/safety?
        See the predicament?
        If you can find a magic way singles [such as you and I] can communicate without the non-sense/scamming of dating sites yet, insure our privacy… I’m all ears and willing to give it a try.
        Just Me [Steve]

  132. I actually knew a guy who was hired by through his modeling agency. All he had to do was look at the profiles of girls that emailed him so they could see he did. That way they wouldn’t know he was a fake. They had him listed in several towns under different names.

    I’ve met some legit men on, POF, and I’m trying out What I’ve learned is many men are unrealistic. They think they somehow deserve better than they do. I’ve got so many guy friends on and they admit they are just on there for a hookup. They say in their profile they want long term, yada yada, but admit to me it’s just an easy way to hook up. Add a great job with a nice salary and they are set! Beware of guys that look too good to be true!

    I’m not perfect, but because I use realistic photos that are current and don’t post 1/2 naked pics, guys pass me up. The ones that take a chance have always commented that I’m sexier and prettier in person. I don’t want to attract the kind of men that my friends have become so I refuse to put it all out there!

    So with all that, here’s my take:
    eHarmony was once a good thing, but now they have no members and have to post fakes to lure more customers-too many hoops to jump through to create a profile. I got one date and he was clearly 10 years older than his pics and I had to pay for eh to screen that for me????? used to be legit about 10 years ago, but all the scammers figured out the system. I’ve had several friends (even my brother) meet and marry from (BUT 10 years ago)
    POF: Creepy!!!!!!! You honestly get what you pay for and POF is free! Every loser that’s not willing to pay goes on POF. I’ve met some of the biggest low life’s on POF. But…their site is easy to maneuver! Lol!
    Ourtime: no different than all the rest…just older and more set in their ways…their site is also pitiful, forcing winks and flirts,etc when you don’t want that.
    GOOD LUCK ALL! (Apparently we all need it)

    • JKB I doubt you actually have a friend paid by match to look at profiles. Send me his email address so I can confirm this otherwise it’s simply not true.

      • Kelly Netzenheim says:

        I totally believe these sites pay for people to simply respond to new members, to get them interested and hopeful. Ten years of experience here. All the sites I have joined in the beginning send you lots of winks, flirts, whatever, from very interesting matches, but nothing pans out, then everything fades away to all the creeps, oddballs, the fat and ugly, scammers. Be very wary.

  133. WORD TO THE WISE…. genernally speaking to all. Classy ladies do NOT want to see or hook up with “babydaddy loser nicknames or tags,” for sure the sexual undertone nicknames/tags are a sign to run the other way and your bedroom pictures should be left for the one you find the true connection with NOT the permanent files of the internet.

    So please…. clean up your names and/or tag lines. Dark pictures only tell me you’re trying to hide something. Full body pics are great. But, I also want to see close up pics because that is where the true story of your soul is. Pictures of your activities are nice, however, if you are not in them then please only post one…. not the other way around.

  134. I was also scammed by Our Time – in order to view the members (to try to decide if I wanted to join), I had to set up a user name. I did not realize that each person I viewed received a notice that I had viewed them. I also “favorited” a few people for future reference – again, I did not know that they received a message that I had favorited them. Of course, a few of them sent emails to me and asked for a phote, etc., which I had not added as I had not joined yet. A member who I was kind of interested in, sent me an email and asked for a photo. As I was not a member yet, I could not respond to his email. I did not want to be rude and not respond to him (I would not want someone to do that to me) so I joined and spent $71! I incorrectly thought that if I cancelled before the end of the first month, I would get a refund – WRONG – once they have your money, no refunds for any reason! This is not clearly stated except on their detailed terms and conditions (and no one reads those). Anyhow, the guy turned out to be a flake, sent several emails to me, suggested we meet, called me once for 1 minute to ask that we set up a time to meet in a few days, then emails me to cancel and “wish me luck” with no explanation! I did not see anyone else on the site of interest to me, so I spent $71 to meet someone who ‘terminated’ me before he ever met me (thought he did waste my time for a month). I did not get very many responses from local guys but got about 15 emails from guys in other states?? Maybe those are the fake members? Anyhow, I am not happy about their no-refund policy and think it should be illegal. The whole thing is shady! I will not join again.

  135. I have been on Match off and on for a couple of years. The women I have contacted rarely respond. I don’t know if they don’t have a membership and are unable to or they are just too lazy to even hit the “no thanks” button. The last time I canceled my membership all of a sudden I started receiving messages and winks and women who have favorited me. But I couldn’t find out who until I signed up again. There are many scammers on match but I know a 25 year old woman out of state is not going to be interested in a 54 year old man. Sign up for one month at a time. When you cancel you membership they come back offering you 3 months for the price of one. So you pay for one month and get two more free.

    I accidentally clicked on some button on match and they instantly imported my entire profile over to Nothing even popped up asking me if it was ok. So now I have a profile there. Since I started getting messages and flirts I thought I would pay for one month and check it out. The one month membership fee is $23.99. What they don’t tell you is there is a $3.99 credit card processing fee so the first month is $27.99. Total rip off. After checking my messages I realized I have probably wasted my money. Several were from out of state or much older. I will see if I hear from any that I write to.

  136. It has been very enlightening reading about all of your experiences and comments. I almost joined and in the course of trying to locate a phone number for them, I found this blog. Now I will not be joining!!! Thank you all for the heads up.
    .. But what is a 56 year old fit active lady to do?? I too find interest groups are either all couples or all women!!

  137. Dennis near Belleville, Ontario, Canada says:

    The posts here are a fascinating read but the thing that sort of jumps of the page at me is that almost every poster is someone wanting to meet some. In other words, it’s like being at a party where not only is everyone single but everyone is looking … and everyone knows it. Yet, apparently no connections. Why? I think the answer is in that we have all developed the mindset that one can meet people in only certain places – like Internet dating sites. Why doesn’t everyone give their name here as I have – with location. For all I, or any one else knows, there is someone posting here that lives down the street or across town or something. But, with no location info, we assume everyone else is on the other side of the continent.
    To get back on topic, I do a WhoIS lookup (this a linux command but I don’t know what the windows equivalent is or if there even is one) on the domain name of any dating site I am contemplating. These results most often send me scurrying away as most are in obscure foreign contries that I do not think I want to do business with. Others, like appear to be owned by a company in Texas but the domain registration info is extremely vague, which does not exactly build confidence, i.e., it strikes me that someone is hiding something.
    I think is a good place to avoid. I started to sign up for but became wary when I had to fill out an extensive profile before I could get anywhere. I aborted that mission. Next day I got a list of matches of which two were interesting and within a half hour drive to towns that I travel to frequently (in easterna Ontario, a half hour drive is akin to a couple of blocks in, say, Montreal, New York, or Toronto). Anyhow, I write a brief message to the one lady only to find that, forget the profile, only wants the money. Weird thing is, the lady lives in a hamlet of less than 100 people.
    Bottom line? If an interesting conversation with an attractive person that is clearly single in the supermarket check out can’t lead to something interesting, it is unlikely that Internet dating sites will either.
    The other bottom line? I would happily pay much more than the rates IF the quality of service was apparent. It looks like a waste of time and money to me.
    – Dennis

  138. Don’t join this site, it is mostly ghost writers and almost no real people are on it. If you figure this out and say something about it in one of your mails they sensor you and you don’t hear from anyone. Which says how bad it must really be.

  139. I have tried site after site and continue to have the same ‘losers’ on all of them. Love the ones where you get a message and when you look, the person is no longer active (if they ever were. On this site, I have stated I want someone within 50 miles of my location and getting them from all over the US. Also, keep getting flirts and messages from 45 y/o’s. Come on people, I’m not a cougar and am not interested in someone that is my son’s age. Met one guy for coffee who said he was my age. As soon as I walked in I could tell he was 15 – 20 years older than me….why lie about something that will be so obvious! So unrealistic. I give up! I will just have to believe that if it is meant to be it will be.

  140. I have fun with, lead to I discovered exactly what I was looking for.
    You’ve ended my 4 day lengthy hunt! God Bless you man. Have a nice day. Bye

  141. don. oceanside cA says:

    I read the same story from all the women. “You’re too fat. Too short too hairy too poor. OMG !!!!! YOU actually still work ? Here is the bottom line we “older guys” I’m 56 btw may not be tall dark hamdsome. I’m sure there a bunch of jerks pervs etc but a lot of are just lonely good guys. Not looking for a 14 on a scale of 1 to 10 just a down to earth gal who can enjoy the litle things in life. Had a couple dates. One told could not wait to see me again. But never heard from her again ( liar?? ) and that was the best ofvthe group

  142. OurTime Dating has been running TV ads .. I started setting up a profile this morning .. Before any words, Even before any photos, I got an email saying someone “flirted” with me .. Then an email saying 5 guys had looked at me .. Going to the site, Both emails were total Lies! .. Do not trust this site.. They send out fake stuff .. Today I also removed myself :)

  143. Anglette Sinclair says:

    Cancel this no longer interested in ourtime for women

  144. I read all this and wanted to just see after myself even with all the evidence coming from peoples post here if it is indeed that bad. I had a profile set up a couple months ago that came up as showing many emails, likes, favorites and so on. I decided on the 1 month plan knowing I would immediately cancel it from the start, which was a little tricky, but canceled it. Paid 20 bucks and although a couple emails were real, most were regenerated emails from one person over and over again about 15 times. She wasn’t remotely attractive which confused me even more, but ourtime just doesn’t seem to care how they brand their site. So, after validating with others here take my own example and don’t waste your money. I did try sites like 10 years ago and although I didn’t have success with meeting a partner, I had many dates and some good experiences… Again, avoid…

  145. Check out the BBB. 56 complaints…in the past 4 mths!

  146. Check out BBB for this company. 56 Complaints in 4 mths! I joined for ONE month, because they kept dropping the price to “hook” me. After signing up, I was offered the automatic charges to my credit card, which I denied. Therefore they charged my card the FULL 6 mths in advance! No where did it say this would happen. I cancelled my account in 15 mins from signing up. Told them to no bill my account, since they basically “stole” from me. After 24 hrs, my card was still charged. I sent another email…and got a random auto reply. Finally, emailed them, threatening to contact BBB. This is when they locked my account. Yep, I can’t get in without entering my credit card! In their “conditions” it says ” under no circumstances will there ever be a refund. However you can cancel at any time. Member who cancel will have full access to their account until their time has expired.” Since, I can’t get into my account, they have not only took my money, but aren’t living up to their contract. BBB report filed!

  147. Complete waste – 99% of all internet dating is a joke. I went against my better judgement and joined Our Time for 1 month. It is a complete waste of time. A big problem is that profiles are shown, but unless the person has paid the subscription to “upgrade” they can’t send or receive messages. The website doesn’t say if a person is a paid member or not. If I send a message to a non paid person – I’m completely wasting my time. My finding is that most of the Women on internet dating sites are there vicariously. Can anyone prove me wrong? I’m going back to the old fashioned way – taking my dog to the park, getting out & hopefully meeting someone real – not wasting lonely time in front of a computer screen.

  148. I was going to join Ourtime until I read the comments. What is it with these sites? Why do they have to charge women. I was on POF site (plenty of fish) and have been for a couple of years. Just cancelled because theres nothing but jerks on there as well. And it didn’t cost me anything. So go figure. I work alot and finding a good man is very hard to do. But you still have to be careful so I guess going on websites gives you more control. But like anything these days has to cost money and there will always be a..holes there. Most people dont take it serious like we do. Oh well. Im putting my faith in God. Im sure he will find someone for me when its my time. Good luck to all of you.

  149. I have been on Our Time for about 6 months and I am very happy with it. I was also on Match and EHarmony but received a lot of remote messages and scams.

    On Our Time, I get a lot of messages from local singles and go on a lot of dates.

    I am totally optimistic that I will eventually meet the man I want on this site and
    I plan on remaining on there. I one downside I experience is a lot of messages from other states but the way I feel about that is not an issue, can be kind of complimentary at times. So far, Our Time is great for singles over 50 and the best site I have expperienced.

  150. Just Me [Steve] says:

    @ Kelly Netzenheim:
    You sound like a nice person. Frustrated, but nice.
    I’d like a chance to correct the injustice of those joke dating sites by asking you out but, how would we begin? How would we communicate on an open forum such as this yet still preserve each of our privacy/safety?
    See the predicament?
    If you can find a magic way singles [such as you and I] can communicate on-line without the non-sense/scamming of dating sites yet, insure our privacy… I’m all ears and willing to give it a try.
    Just Me [Steve]

    • Hey Steve, I’m not Kelly but want to say you are spot on about ‘the predicament’.
      I signed onto this site never having considered the notion that ‘I could check out any time I like but I could never leave’. My email took over 500 hits the first week. I never paid anything but looked at a few of my responders. Some seemed like great guys but I’m in Al. and they spanned the gap between Fl. to Canada.
      Now my predicament is that even though I never paid to join I’m still getting beaucoup responses and I can’t disengage.
      This was my first attempt at online dating and I gotta say feels like bad juju. Now I just want out. Thank God I didn’t pay for this misery. Can anybody advise on how to escape?
      And Steve, wish we could have met through mutual friends you sound like my kind of guy .

  151. As a follow up to many comments read…
    Better Business Bureau results for People Media/ [< Dallas, Texas]:

    "BBB has determined that People Media meets BBB accreditation standards, which include a commitment to make a good faith effort to resolve any consumer complaints. BBB Accredited Businesses pay a fee for accreditation review/monitoring and for support of BBB services to the public."

    "BBB accreditation does not mean that the business' products or services have been evaluated or endorsed by BBB, or that BBB has made a determination as to the business' product quality or competency in performing services."

    "Based on BBB files, this business has a BBB Rating of No Rating. The reason is as follows:
    This business is in the process of responding to complaint(s) previously closed as unresolved."

    People Media/ has had 357 complaints with BBB in last 3 years.
    *Now, if the moderators here will just let the [above] information be known/seen… maybe, just maybe the good folks visiting this site will not be ripped off by another scam company.
    Let the buyer beware!

  152. Its not right that they charge so much and you have to pay 6 months at a time. Why not let us go month to month and stop when ever we want. I have better places for my money Hope to hear from you

    • Alice. .that is exactly what I have been thinking. Why can’t those of us that want to go a month at a time be able to do that. In fact, why not just have a month to month charge period?! POF (plenty of fish) is free. . and I’ve been on there for about 3 years. . and so have the men. . .if the pictures are to be believed. I’m personally tired of trying to find someone in a sea of nothing. And to make us have to pay for it is even worse. I understand they have to make money, but looks like they could get that in an easier way. Perhaps through advertising and different ways to collect fees. I am on a fixed income (as I’m sure a lot of people are). . I’m disabled, but very dateable. But my priority is first to pay all my bills. Then to look at dating. I’m sure I’m not the only person with this problem.

  153. Warning: I had someone try to scam me out of $800 for his purported son who lives in the UK. First he asked for my personal e-mail, which I gave him. Now that he has this info, he has used it to sign me up again with our time. Bottom line: avoid these dating sites. They are unsafe now, and riddled with desperate men who want one thing: Your money. Avoid them like the plague.

    • Be very careful My friend was on Match and had 5 YES 5 scammers with kids in the UK

    • Kelly Netzenheim says:

      Create a “false” profile, disguise your name and don’t post a picture. If you meet someone you like and have communicated through email to your satisfaction, you can send him or her a picture when and if you feel comfortable. Don’t give them your phone number, either. Be very careful!

  154. NONE of these sites accurately choose prospects by zip code/distance. All of them give me prospects living 2 – 3 hours away. When their companies become more accurate they may see an increase in usage instead of cancellations from frustrated members.

  155. FYI on the monthly sign-up fee for OutTime dating site… The current monthly fee as of March 2013 is $23.99 per month, and I still don’t see any where you can stop when you choose. Personally, I feel that is an exorbitant fee! I was looking into signing up because it looks like a fun and safe site. Of course everyone must use common sense and caution with any dating site. However, the price has turned me away, as I am sure it has many others. Too bad. :(

    • Ourtime is the biggest ripoff of the 3 sites i’ve been on. They send prospects from across the country and frankly I would not like to date my grandpa with no hair or teeth. ICK ICK ICK!!!!

  156. I foolishly signed up with this online dating site. I thought I was signing up for six months for.$11.99. It was not until I checked my bank account and saw that.$75.93 had been had been deducted. Why even quote a monthly premium, when they only charge for 6 months or more. Then when I responded to my contacts I was told to read their respnse to me I had to upgrade for an additional charge. I am sending a Consumer complaint to The Attorney General in my state as well as contact the BBB. I was onPOF dating site at least they are free, I even met some nice guys. My advise, before you dign up for any.of these sites.check to see if there is a complaint site. The bad ones.will have one.


    The concept is good, horrible implementation.

    A total joke of a site. Poor coding, just because you’re over 50 doesn’t mean you’re senile.

    I’ve been online dating for a few years.

    Match, POF, and OKCupid are way more professional.


  158. All dating sites claim to have millions of members on there. What is not disclosed is that 70 to 80 percent are inactive, fake profiles that allows free 3 day trials and or they are just free subscribers who can’t contact you back. Now decide that by 59 states, then within 50 miles of your geographic area. And then determine what the real odds are. Don’t waist your money.

  159. Yeah I tried these sites. I agree with other posters here. They continue to post your Pic even after you have cancelled. Then after you cancel they come back with all these people who want to meet you? Or they send you a message? How is this happening if you cancelled? It’s obviously fraud to advertise something that is not there. AKA YOU! These guys just Phish for paying customers by using non paying one. This should be against the law. You try to start a conversation with some one and never even get a response and that is because they are not there. I would bet be there are 20 non paying impossible to reach people for every paying on these sites. Oh and then some one wants to talk to you/meet you, you get an email to rejoin (aka send them money) to find out that this person never existed. It’s a scam pure and simple. Save your money and time by not wasting time on people you will never contact. I get these ridiculous messages from zoosk about their match making science and I have 24 hours to respond (aka send them money) Ok so say I send them money to find the other person either does not exist or is not interested. They use your pic as a lure as bait to catch their next victim and then use that victims pic to catch even more. It’s fraud plain and simple. I agree someone should start a class action against these scammers.

    • We should all write to the Better Business Bureau, Attorney General, and Your State Senator and Congressman. Millions of people around the country are paying for what is basically false advertising. Your picture/profile on a date site you quit without any compensation from the date site’s economic gain. If this is not a scam what is? A government agency should look into this industry. Dateline, 20/20 or 60 minutes would have a field day with this story. Get them to sign up undercover to these sites. Stay on for a month. Try to meet people. Quit and see what happens.

  160. i was going to give this site a chance but after reading these posts I am begining to understand in part wby I cant seem to meet
    someone decent…the odds are against us. with this disconnected digital age… regardless of how it seems unbelievabe that we are still single

  161. It has been remarkable to experience the lack responses on Ourtime. I did connect to chat with two women who said my profile spoke well of me but were way out of my area. But not one member in my immediate locale ever responded; I find it mind boggling THAT many people could be inconsiderate enough not to even give a ‘thanks but no thanks’ reply. I got scammers from the Philippines who just wanted to throw insults ( ? ) or messages from members from several states away from me. On the whole OT is a waste of money. I’m not waiting for my membership to expire to jump ship,and I did pay for 6 months; I’m going to join singles’ hiking groups in my area so I can at least see if a person can still walk or not…

  162. Ourtime is a good concept, 50 plus. I know I have enjoyed every day looking for someone who is not looking for me. It is a life lesson for this first time optimist female looking for serious relationship. I feel like I’m in school, “does he like me” “will he respond to my messages? Ugh, I receive 1% response return on my investment. Are men on this sight so overwhelmed with women they can not response with a “No thank you, your too old” “Thank you, but not interested”? Also, my daily matches that are carefully selected “He has a dog, you like dogs” OMG…….. Price is low, but you get what you pay for.

    • I have actually contacted two women within 15 miles of me and actually had response from both on Ourtime. I agree though, I specifically placed in the search, within 50 miles of my hometown and ages 45-52, but I still get 60+ year old women from three states over or across the country showing up. I just joined for one month and I have responded back to three women that marked me as favorite even though they were not within my targeted age. I figured it was the decent thing to do. I’m hoping to go out with at least one person on here before the month is up. lol

      • Kelly Netzenheim says:

        I find that all the dating websites have two things in common: men who are total losers (obese, bankrupt, batterers, alcoholic/drug abusers, obsessive stalkers, religious fanatics) or those who want only “Barbie Dolls”. Nothing in between, right? Just normal, nice, average men and women who are single, with no baggage, looking for someone to spend a little fun, quality time with. Too much to ask? Apparently so!

  163. I believe Our Time is no different from any other site except you have immature older people on it. They have you put if you want a serious relationship, but I guess as a society we forgot what a serious relationship represents?????? I was Our Time for almost a year due my membership that I stupidly did should have gone month to month but of course they make the cost cheaper for a year which I think at the end it cost you more. Our time is just another

  164. Have been an active user for half year, met some people, and for that it’s “an ok” dating website.
    What I don’t like the most about ourtime dating website is that they have a world wide known money fraud scammer’s. All the picture of those victims are used to get money from people. I personally had one asking me for money (pretending that he’s widowed and he’s left with son). I found his picture on this website

    He’s name on ourtime is cute2luv20, and on the link that I attached he’s is on the 4th row of world wide known scammers. To be more correct (his picture) is involved in all types scam and money fraud.
    I contacted ourtime dating website all they did they just sent me the link for dating tips. They never removed that guy profile, nor blocked him. I personally think THAT THEY ARE TAKING A CUT FROM ALL MONEY SCAMMERS- THAT’S WHY THEY ALLOW THEM THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  165. Kenneth Lacy says:

    NO! This website is The biggest Scam of all dating websites out there!

  166. Try it’s free NOW-before launch- did it

  167. I joined OurTime for one month. In the first 24 hours I received 37 hits. That is with no photo. One gentleman continued to chase me and I finally decided to meet him, he was local. We met for coffee and he appeared to be just an average divorced male. He had told me he had been married once, but in the conversation I asked the question differently , guess what he was married twice, had lived with another woman and I found out he was a woman chaser. Also have been on the program for 1year +! And, quite a bit more!! These programs are not on the up-and-up. Anyone can join, released prisoners etc. Most of the photos are not current. You stand a better chance in the Super Market!!!!


  1. […] Compare this to Ourtime, the new over-50 dating site run by Match-owned People Media. My post on OurTime by far has the most comments of any post on this […]

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