The virtual dating concept has “officially” been around for several years. I’ve been following the virtual dating scene because I think there is something there that some singles will find useful.
Today you will find that there are a handful of companies competing for singles’ virtual dating dollars, ranging from OmniDate’s Flash-based offering to several downloadable applications (Seriously, a downloadable dating client? Get in the browser, quick!)
I’ve wailed on the sector and its participants for years, because as someone who knows a hell of a lot about virtual worlds and what singles want, what I’m seeing delivered is not exactly what singles are clamoring for. Theres a few research reports flying around, but I talk to dating site owners every day, and the truth of the matter is that virtual dating needs to evolve before it starts to really take off, from the dating and and singles’ perspective.
OmniDate, the developer of a plug-and-play virtual dating application for dating sites, understands the concept of evolution. Recently they added a plug-in chat to their offering, which is good news. They also have some new customer wins, which is good for everyone involved. If OmniDate legitimizes the sector and proves that virtual dating works and makes dating sites money, they just might embrace it. Right now the equation is halfway-solved.
I keep reading that virtual dates tend to last substantially longer than chats, with the proportion of virtual dates lasting over 60 minutes being almost twice as high as that of chats. If there are ads in that chat, or product placements or people can click to buy their date a rose or a song or some other bling, we’ve got some revenue flowing, a more interactive exciting environment and something more akin to a win for the dating industry.
Chat is a good start, but let’s remember to keep the ball moving. Trial Omnidate and their competitors, kick the tires, and most of all, tell them what works and what doesn’t. Vendors absolutely need to hear their potential customer’s feedback. It’s not like they build Facebook or Quicken in a vacuum and just rolled it out to the public one day (Well maybe FB). Build, test, fail, iterate, test and eventually it all comes together and everyone is generally satisfied with the results and the service will be adopted. Thats how the Internet works.
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Virtual dating. Take it from someone who knows, weopia and omnidate are doing it totally wrong. The reason in simple: they entered the business with no experience, only the desire to make money. So…they’re recreating what is already available for free. Let’s put it this way. The CEO of weopia asked me for help finding justification for virtual dating when he should have understood that before he even entered the trade. Of course what they’re doing sucks (and is akin to Second Life four or five years ago). It’s being built by people who have no idea how virtual dating works. But I do, not only because of my background in psychometrics, but because I met my real life husband in a virtual world and have been researching it for years. http://sl2rllove.blogspot.com/ Just wait. Later this year you’ll see what virtual dating was meant to be when we release our world. 8))
Proclaim to know it all, trash the competition in front of the dating industry and you have nothing to show us (Raises eyebrows).
For 99% of singles, dating is about picking up the phone or sending a text/email and going and doing something face to face. Long-distance relationships and other edge cases, while just as real and important as another other type of courtship, simply don’t seem like a big draw for online daters. That’s ok, virtual dating in it’s current incarnation is a niche thing. If it grows, great, if it doesn’t, lessons learned.
I used to flirt with people in Worlds Inc a decade before Second Life was popular. I get it, believe me.
Virtual dating is about discovering someone, entering virtual environment where two (or more) people can meet, listen to music, play games and learn about each other. The discovery process is important and often-ignored. Either you are in a room with 50 other avatars, looking for a needle in a haystack, or in a one-on-one environment, where you have performed some sort of pre-selection.
People spend around five hours a week participating in online dating efforts. Virtual dating is going to increase that number greatly, which is exactly what 99% of singles don’t want. So how do we work through the pre-selection process to make the virtual dates count? This is where I want to hear people talking about.
I’m ignoring in part the whole “traipse around SL for days looking for people” issue. I don’t have the time and I don’t know many people who can sit in-world for days on end looking for a date. Again, I’m talking here about general singles, there will always be people for whom virtual dating is a key part of their experience, or a happy by-product in SL, WOW, Omnidate or wherever.
For the time being, it’s a steep learning curve for everyone involved, at least until integration, revenue models, benefits, interactivity and engagement are figured out. The only way this can be done is with pilot programs and user testing.
In a short time we’ll have 4-5 virtual dating environments to choose from. Flash, HTML5, download client. And what about IMVU or Yahoo avatars? Millions of users flirting and playing and interacting already. Lot’s of options to choose from, those fickle singles.
And we haven’t even talked about gaming consoles, cable tv dating channels and a whole bunch of other options. Or creating a virtual dating app for Facebook, which I wish someone would do already.
Indeed. Did you know anyone can start a business selling fishing supplies online? I could, but I know nothing about it other than what I’ve read. Which is comparable to what weopia and omnidate have done. Yes, they read the Harvard/MIT study and sure enough discovered that there is MONEY TO BE MADE!!!1!! (dollar signs light up, developers are hired) Must fill that niche with no understanding of what people actually do, with no idea how it works. So I do know more. Well, you know that, we’ve talked. And it’s OK that I do, I’ve had a long career in fields like psychometrics, which brought me to this place where my personal virtual courtship experience is also a factor.
Among other things, you said, “For 99% of singles, dating is about picking up the phone or sending a text/email and going and doing something face to face.” Yup, just like it was in 1996. So that’s how it is now, the static volley the ball back and forth, then the waste of time and money on dating, be rejected numerous times (for most of us), then to go back to the drawing board.
Just like life before myspace and facebook, they don’t know what they don’t know. But in real time dating online, you can have numerous dates in one evening, saving a hell of a lot of time and money. If can be based on location if you want it to (sure, we’re aware that is a feature), but it doesn’t have to be, so there’s absolutely no advantage to database only dates. Facebook, even with the web as you’ve described it (which I recently referenced on a comment somewhere else, lest you think I don’t like it), is a TOOL. It’s still database driven, it still relies on throwing that ball back and forth and hoping that the data is somehow a magic potion for love, when we all know it’s not, no matter how many things you think you know about me based on my fan pages. Facebook is a mechanism to link people on a database, a tool, but not a mechanism for actual dating, which virtual worlds are. Totally a first step, but still static. Even de-contextualized IMs are static in comparison to what you can do on a date in world.
As far as wandering SL, well yes, that’s probably the entire justification of what we’re building…so that you don’t have to wander blindly. We are NOT building a new SL. We are also not making a private island which is available now for free on SL, with more features, and just about the same level of privacy given how empty that huge world is. Not that I think people want to be stuck on a deserted island with someone they just met. I don’t think that. Part of what virtual communities do, which weopia and omnidate don’t, is actually EXPAND your potential dating pool by friends you meet through common interests in a real time experience.
And unless you have spent time in a virtual world now, and understand the cultures that thrive there, and the normalcy of the majority of people who go there, you are describing to me by what you’ve said that yes, you’ve used a rotary telephone and it’s like my mobile. It does the same thing…makes calls…yes. There are years of improvements in the UNDERSTANDING people have of virtual relationships that you don’t have. It is an evolving process, where stupid questions like “are my feelings in world real” have finally been answered, and we can assume that “I am in control of my avatar”. Yes, we have moved on a bit from the good old days with our use of the platforms.
Dave, I think you are stellar. And I *sure am* taking on the industry because they are only here to make money from people’s loneliness and desire to be in love. I’d rather be completely wrong than be partially right. For them, online dating and virtual courtship is a business decision about their pockets–that’s why they started and that’s why they’re here.
IMVU and the like are important to us, they help educate the market on minimal virtual possibilities. So in our case, if you can use an ipad, you will be able to use our service. And you know, I’m exhausted of being told online daters are technophobic and incompetent, that they are unable pick an avatar from a list of options, or make it walk, or turn on their cams and mics and chat. Did you know SL’s demographics are primarily women 30+? Surprised? It’s been adopted primarily by housewives. I can give you references on that.
I owe everyone including you and our partners a one pager on what we’re doing. I hope to have it with approvals within two weeks. And to you, thanks for taking the time. You are important to me for how you help shape what I think.
Like to date online? Try http://www.chuzi.ph!!!
It’s just instant message but brought up a couple of levels.
Big deal.
As CEO of Weopia, referred to by Stacy above, I’d like to add that I don’t know who she is and don’t recall ever asking her for help in finding justification for virtual dating. But we are always looking for more and better information to refine our product and we have fortunately spoken with hundreds of people in the industry.
Our concept evolved out of my partner’s many years of Second Life experiences and the many dates that came from hanging out there. I come from the sociology and psychology side and have always been interested in the science of relationship building. We thought there was a better way to bring it all together and so we built it. Our beta test model was a download, but we have a fully functional webplayer model that we are about to launch, and it will be text chat and voice-enabled.
David, it is nice to hear your positive thoughts on virtual dating. Omnidate has done an excellent job introducing the concept of virtual dating to the online dating industry and its members. I wish to commend them for that. Competition is good and I hope that Stacy brings something to market that will help to further expand awareness and understanding of the benefits of virtual dating.